Roblosophy: An unhealthy obsession

RoblosophyDear Rob,

Today we’re gonna get serious. And I don’t mean that “Friday Serious” when I say we’re gonna get serious and then after the jump post pictures of you and TomStu swapping underwear & doing a gig with the rest of the Brit Pack. I mean like really serious.

Awhile ago we got this email from someone who mistakenly thought we had contact with you:

Subject: This concersns Rob. Please help m in distress

I am a 29 year married woman.

I have been a fan of Robert Pattinson from a very long time.I am in love with his mannerisms,his smile and his marvelous eyes. I love watcing his interviews. No I am not in love with the character of Edward that he potrayed in Twilight series. But I like to see him in his original self rather than in movies. I know this is weird because I havent met him so I do not really know him. But inspite of that for the last two years I am literally in love with him. Now this has reached a stage of TRAUMA for me.I am not able to eat or sleep even. I want to meet him badly..even if it is just for once in my entire lifetime. I know his life and mine are entirley different but I feel that i will feel better if I meet him just once. But I do not have any contacts to reach him nor do I stay in the USA..I stay in India. So I know that my chances of my wish being granted is nil.

I am losing out any interest to live. This may be aggravated by the fact that I am trapped and being tortured in a loveless married life. Now I have become sort of frustrated every moment I wish that talking to Robert will make me feel good. I just want to lead my life in a normal way,I also want to enjoy my life. But I am in so much pain that I am unable to do so.This feeling is killing me.

Sounds completely crazy I know..but thats how it is for me. Pls help. I will be really grateful if somebody helps me out of my terrible condition.

Please mail me back at my this e-address.

At first I hoped it was a hoax- a not-so-funny-but-nice-attempt joke by an LTR reader at faking us out to think they thought they were writing to Rob, but really they were writing to LTR. But… I’m afraid this one, like many who have come before it, feels too real.

The first thought running through my head after I read this was of horror and sadness. I immediately forwarded it to Moon, then teared up while telling Mr. Choice about it (Moon comes before Mr. Choice. Always) He immediately told me I had to write her to tell her we didn’t know Rob (which he says about every crazy email or email from 11 year old giving out full personal details of her life including street address, phone number, school & teacher) and I was torn- what if writing back to her made it worse? She thinks for 3 seconds while the email is opening that Rob is going to get in touch, only to find out it’s me, crushing her dreams? When did it become my responsibility to “police the internet” and respond to people who do something questionable or get the wrong impression (The ethical plight of a blogger- a conversation for another time. I have many times written back to the 10 year olds who give out personal information online, advising them against it. But if I wrote back to every kid thinking we were Twilight, that would be my full-time job.) But my ethical dilemma got me thinking about yours:

We got this e-mail because she thinks we have contact with YOU. She’s not feeling these things because of ME. It’s not my role or lack-there-of in her life that caused her this emotional melt-down. And if we’ve gotten a few letters of this type and we’re not even you, I can’t imagine how many more letters have been written just like this one with unrealistic expectations that you can’t or should’t have to meet. I can’t imagine that pressure.

Maybe you don’t even read your fan mail. (Probable) Maybe you can’t read anymore because of all the Heineken and processed food you’ve consumed (also Probable) Maybe a jealous girl in your life intercepts your mail & shreds it before you have a chance (Stage 5 Clinger?) or maybe there is some class celebrities take at celebrity school where they’re taught by a season psychologist on how to deal with the ethical dilemma of people having expectations that they should not, of having feelings you never asked them to and you not being able to, not wanting to or not needing to really do anything about it.

So why exploit a young girl’s troubles like this on the internet? Well, there’s nothing else to talk about- wait no- that’s not it. I’ve wanted to talk about this for awhile. Because people are passionate about you, Rob- in good ways & bad ways. I can argue about it with those who disagree, but a lot of the “passion” is unhealthy. Maybe not “I will commit suicide” unhealthy, but there are varying levels of unhealthiness in this fandom. Sometimes I want to shake people and remind them whey we liked Twilight/Rob/each other in the first place- because we had something in common. And LTR has always existed to make fun of things- so no one should be surprised when we do, but I digress.

So today I want to think about this letter writer and those like her (maybe someone reading this LTR today?) I want to think about how her “acute fondness” of you turned into unhealthy obsession and make sure I and those I love (all those reading, plus a few others who will read tomorrow but not those who will read Sunday because that’s too long to go without LTR) don’t pass the threshold of healthy Rob-lovin’ to unhealthy, possibly certifiably crazy obsession.

God I just got preachy. Sorry about that. Or just call me Sister UC. I kinda like it.


Soooooo… what do you think? What turns normal-Robsessing into not normal Robsession? Where do you think you fall on the line of Normal Obsession to possibly unhealthy? Too embarrassed to admit in the comments? Take this poll:

[polldaddy poll=3813587]

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