Rob’s on the auction block and I make a plan

Read this:

Dear Rob,

Do you know that a 2 night stay in a hotel with you during Breaking Dawn Filming in Vancouver, is being auctioned off for a good cause?

You must have been listening when I wanted you to be more like Kellan in regards to charity. But this is AHMAZING! I mean talk about sacrifice! You never know WHO could win this thing or who you’ll be in a hotel room with for 2 nights. It could be a crazy Krisbian who really just wants to meet Kristen or wants to tell you to treat her right, or maybe it’s it Taylor Swift hoping to win back TLaut or it could be one of those crazy Rob fans who are “on the list.” You know the list. OR it could be me because I’ve taken out a 2nd mortgage, drained my 401K, withdrew all our LTT store money (27 dollars!) and “borrowed” all of UC and Mr. Choice’s life savings (shhh! Don’t tell) and started selling life size cardboard Jumping Rob’s (a gabillion in preorders already!). So I’m pretty sure, unless Nikki Reed starts bidding against me (I can’t compete against revenge money) I will win!! Don’t be scuuuurrred!

But what will we do for 2 whole days in a hotel room? Ok, get your mind out of the gutter (no wait, don’t).

I’ve come up with a few ideas for our two days…

and just because we can now… follow the jump(ing Rob) for the rest!!

Perfect for your South American vacation!

I’ve come up with a few ideas for our two days…

  • Design, create and market the new Robert Pattinson Swimwear collection which is just us basically opening an Etsy shop and selling off your old underwear. The ones with the elastic band that’s shot.
  • Spend the entire two days with me sitting in a chair while you recreate Jumping Rob off the bed. and if I get bored of that I’ll take you to the pool where you can do jumping rob there.
  • You’ll read me ALL of Dick’s emails to you. And then act them out as necessary. We may even Skype in Dick and Clare for fun since we’re pals and stuff. Your Mom and I will compare notes on the gossip we’ve read and what we think is true or not. We probably don’t need you interrupting at that point since our ideas about the truth are way better anyway. Your Mom loves to “break it down.”

Wait you auctioned off WHAT??

  • While you’re personally testing each pair of your “Robert Pattinson Swimwear line” I’ll sneak UC into the room so you can show her Jumping Rob and then after we can put our college degrees to good use by writing and singing (in 3 part harmony) a song called “Three is the magic number.”
  • You will break out the Jitterbug phone and I will break out the LTR/LTT Rolodex and we will crank call everyone we know. We’ve done it on podcasts before so prepare yourselves people if you answer the phone and hear heavy breathing on the other end, it’s probably just me and Robert Pattinson.

It’s looks like the bids are now up to 10k+ but don’t worry I’ve got this, Rob… unless one of these LTR biotches tries to challenge me and them I say BRING IT!!!!!!!

Going once… going twice…
Themoonisdown

10K??!!! Is someone serious?? They say it’s valued at 25k… What is a chance to meet Robert Pattinson worth to you guys? Don’t say invaluable! What would YOU do with Rob in a hotel room for 2 days BESIDES the obvious!

If you’ve got the cash money bid on the auction here!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

Business Time!

Don’t forget the half off Bite Me notepads sale!! Perfect time to stock up right before the holidays and get part of your shopping done! SCORE!!!

145 Responses to “Rob’s on the auction block and I make a plan”

  1. dazzledtodeath says:

    If I win I’ll be welding the door shut and barring the windows. Two night stay?? Ha! I want forever Rob!

  2. Tigerkitten36 says:

    Moon,

    Let me sent you my phone number so that you’ll be sure to call me when your with Rob.

    Is there a rush option on the cardbord jumping Rob?

  3. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by LetterstoTwilight, Anna. Anna said: RT @letter2twilight: It’s time for a NEW LTR: Rob’s on the auction block and I make a plan – http://tinyurl.com/2vn3udn […]

  4. MidnightCougar says:

    Don’t fret Moon, they “value” it at $25k, but, as I’m sure you’re aware, the last Twilight-related auction bid went for $60,100, for the Vancouver Set visit. Now that’s more like it! Rob is definitely worth at least that!!

    But, honestly how does one really price-value a 2 night stay in a hotel with Rob? *sigh* See now this is exactly why I have a FFL (freebie-fuck-list) & Rob is #1! πŸ˜‰

  5. kandnandb says:

    *calls up hubby to ask how much is in my 401(k)*

    Him: “Why?”
    Me: “Oh, you know…just curious.”
    Him: “Are you leaving me for another man?”
    Me: “Pfft, don’t be ridiculous. (pause) I don’t have enough money.”

    • alice_av says:

      oh my god! I think he is suspicious … lol

    • melronin says:

      LMAO!!!
      Why do husbands always think we wanna leave them when we ask for money? Is that normal male behaviour or do we really wanna leave them unconsciously? Hmmmm….
      To leave…or….not to leave???

      • alice_av says:

        not husband or bf here, but i do not know why they always come out for that… and they say we are insecure yeah right!!
        I will not advice against your marriage however if you have the chance for 2 nights with Rob, I mean girl… go for it? lol

      • MidnightCougar says:

        After 21 yrs with me, my husband really doesn’t show any concerns about me foolin’ around. I guess he figures I’d have already done it by now, or else he just doesn’t give a shit! And, he knows I’d “do” Rob if given the opportunity, so I’m ready to dish out some serious $$! lol

    • Stacey says:

      You crack me up! :0)

  6. dazzledtodeath says:

    Maybe we could take up a collection and split up the two days? Each get a half hour with Rob or something? Who’s in?

    • MidnightCougar says:

      *JUMPING UP & DOWN* ME, ME!! πŸ™‚ What a fantastic idea dtd!

      • dazzledtodeath says:

        okay, you’re in. But after rethinking, I think we should only take 6-8 more people. I mean, we’re not going to TALK to Rob, right? He’s young, so his recovery time s/b good, but we don’t want to overwork him. And he might need a nap.

        • MidnightCougar says:

          “his recovery time” lmao, & at 24 he should be good-to-go again, in say 10 min or so?! πŸ˜‰

        • melronin says:

          Hahahaaa…d2d…I thought Moon asked us to write down what we would do with Rob in those two days BESIDES THE OBVIOUS!!! Damn…why am I even squeezing my brain out here for the last half hour to find something very very interesting to do with the baby BESIDES THE OBVIOUS??? Am IN of course….what’s my share???

          hey…and how many are we already??? 1-2-3…just checkin…

    • Cazza says:

      Empties my piggy bank……..I’m in!!!!

      X

    • robsfuturemate says:

      I’m in!!! And going after MC is okay by me, she’s sure to have taught Rob some new tricks!!!!

      • MidnightCougar says:

        LMFAO, my dear, I’ve been around a while, & I could definitely warm him up with experience for you. You know I should be offended by the age comment, you’re lucky I <3 you so much!! HA! You wait, when I get back from my meeting, which I'm late for btw, I'm gonna send you a nasty e-mail! xo

    • LatersBaby says:

      I’ll occupy Dean while I wait my turn to meet Rob. I just want to give Rob a hug. One of those very special “internal” hugs.

    • Alice_NaA says:

      I found 5 euro in some old trousers when cleaning up my closet yesterday. Don’t worry, I only need 1 second and the impregnating stare.

    • ladyofthemeadow says:

      Maybe we can get some TomStu thrown in, like a “free gift with purchase”. Actually I’ll take a little Kellan as my fgwp.

  7. Soosiedoosie says:

    I would definately pay $25 K and I’d get him to sing and play guitar all night like he did for Sia! Sigh!

  8. Cazza says:

    Err girls, did anybody look at the terms and conditions at the bottom of the bidding page?!! And I quote:

    “All Participants understand they will need to behave in a reasonable and appropriate manner at all times during the experience.”

    I think we just eliminated ourselves even before bidding πŸ˜‰

    X

  9. JennyluvsJax says:

    Well some of us should get together and Rob a bank and then pay it back slowly when we can. Then win the hotel room and then just romance the pants off him. He will know what to do with a couple of hot girls in a dim lit room and he would know just How to be!~ While Robsfuturemate finishes him off I can have a go with his bestie Jackson.

  10. sallycinnamon says:

    Pssh, girls, a 2 night stay in a hotel with Rob is worth way more than $10,000 or even $25,000 (I mean, when you consider everything that could go down in that room in 2 days); however, some poor, clueless soul is willing to pay $10,000 for a mere meet and greet! That’s all this is. You know you’ll be booked across town from Rob and the rest of the cast in the local Econo Lodge. Just hang out by Rob’s local dumpsters long enough and you’ll get a meet and greet for free (I’ve done it, so what).

    • kristen's bestie says:

      Wait…. what are you saying? That it’s NOT a two night meet and greet with Rob?

      • sallycinnamon says:

        Hate to burst your bubble.

        I also spotted this in the fine print:
        “The opportunity to meet Robert Pattinson will depend on availability of his filming schedule.”

        So, are they saying that there is a possibility that even after we all empty our saving accounts, we might not even meet Rob after all?!

        • kristen's bestie says:

          Damn!

          Not meet him at all? That alone would cause all kinds of inappropriateness and cray cray actions on the one who wins!

    • robsfuturemate says:

      I’m always looking for a free meet and greet! On the WFE set, 100 Monkeys shows, etc…hasn’t happened yet but I’m not giving up hope!

    • robgirl86 says:

      I like your dumpster theory…a lot πŸ™‚
      spares a lot of money and you might meet TomStu as well instead of the youknowwhoperson!

      • sallycinnamon says:

        It’s not even a theory anymore.

        • robgirl86 says:

          So, you met Rob behind the dumpster? Where, when, details please…lol, lemme guess, London, pub, gig, ciggie pause, great chat? πŸ™‚

          • sallycinnamon says:

            My fiance met him NEAR a dumpster. They talked for like 20 minutes, THEN he came to get me so I could say hello. This is all kinds of wrong.

          • robsfuturemate says:

            Confused! Why is this “all kinds of Rob”? If you’ve really met Rob we need all the details!!!

          • robsfuturemate says:

            Wow! That was supposed to be “all kinds of wrong” NOT Rob!!! That was a huge Freudian slip!!

          • sallycinnamon says:

            No, no, no, it wasn’t wrong meeting him. It was wrong that my boyfriend met him, chatted to him for nearly 20 minutes, and THEN came to get me so I could meet him. What were they really doing hanging out near a dumpster that long? Why didn’t he come get me right away? No, he left me alone at the front of a venue. He wasn’t even trying to meet him, but you know, my boyfriend hangs around dumpsters too just for the heck of it. And everyone we know says how “Edward-ly” he is. Edward would not hog all of the attention to himself instead of inviting the girl with 10 Edward action figures to meet Robert Pattinson right away!

          • robsfuturemate says:

            That’s a funny story about your Edward-esque boyfriend…but we want to hear about ROB! πŸ˜‰ What was he wearing, how did he smell, what did he say?! Enquiring minds want to know!!!

          • sallycinnamon says:

            Black t-shirt, blue shrt over top, black pants, black shoes. Longer, really greasy hair of original Twilight promo tour era. Smelled like smoke, a bit of alcohol, and that musky man smell. He didn’t stink or smell bad at all! His breath even smelled good. He could have breathed on me all night and I would have been in heaven. He was nice, funny and self-depricating. He put his arm around me and bent down because I’m so short he couldn’t hear what I was saying.

        • melronin says:

          It’s not a THEORY any more??? Omg….really??? And you’ve done it and…so what??? (your words)
          Ohhhhh…am all ears cause maybe that boy is overestimated afterall! πŸ˜€

        • LatersBaby says:

          Spill it Sally!

  11. Jamie says:

    My.God. Is he insane?!? Will there be a bonus buy Rob get Dean for free? I mean, I’m thinking there will probably be a bodyguard in ther at all times….
    So who wants to place some bets on what twi-fan stereotype is gonna win this thing? I’m thinking 4:1 it will be a Twi-mom who drained her kids college fund, or 2:1 a super rich parents who buys this for their teen daughter, like that kiss thing a year or so ago.

  12. JumpingROBlover says:

    Oh I never wished for my daddy to be filthy rich before this moment.
    BTW love love love having Rob recreating the Jumping Rob in the Bed. Probably not a good idea to do it in the hotel pool. Interruptions are no good.

    Did anyone see the new pics of KK riding on Robs back? Jealous much!

  13. melronin says:

    Anybody else has the vision of that Bel Ami orgy scene in mind or is it just me????
    πŸ˜€

  14. robsfuturemate says:

    I got excited just thinking of a meet and greet with Clare and Dick!!! Dick giving out friendly advice on being refined and Clare def knows how to “break it down” with the gossip rags!

    As for Rob, I think that our Game Night ideas would be the best “unobvious” activity!! Although, we did include Strip into many of them!!!

  15. robgirl86 says:

    Beside the OBVIOUS I think I would DO the obvious, DOING him obviously!
    And obviously he would love it … A girl can dream obviously!

    • melronin says:

      probably dear…pro.ba.bly!!!!

    • MidnightCougar says:

      Of course “he would love it” RG, as older, more mature women, we can give him experiences maybe a younger *ahem* girl couldn’t. IMO πŸ™‚

      • robgirl86 says:

        WHAT? “Older”? “More mature”?
        Nooooooo, I’m young, always willig to learn and he will be MY TEACHER, obviously! πŸ™‚

        • MidnightCougar says:

          Yes, I’m sorry RG, I know you’re no where near the “Cougar” status yet. My mistake. xo

        • robgirl86 says:

          @Mc..no no, it’s ok honey, know what I just don’t like at all, the word “cougar”, that sounds soo weird to my german ears, like “old and desperate”..surely its not the meaning, I just dislike this term very very much..and…you are NOT old as well…hello BEST years??? πŸ™‚

          • MidnightCougar says:

            Oh RG, you are sweet, no worries, I’m just carrying on, but I can see where you would find the term derogatory b/c the definition is: “Cougar – The term is commonly applied to women who are forty or older and pursue younger men.” lol, I fit right into that category, but I don’t worry about it anymore. It’s all for fun & a good laughl. πŸ™‚ <3

          • robgirl86 says:

            @MC see, that’s why I don’t like it, any classification term is totally NOT cool! There are 40y old badass hot woman and very lame and old 20y old girls!

    • LatersBaby says:

      Well, obviously.

  16. Robsessedgirl says:

    I AM SO IN. I actually called up my father to inquire about this:

    Me: hey dad, um do you have 20,000 dollars to spare? I’m sort of kidding but not really.

    Him: oh AHHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAHH *hysterical laughter for five minutes* may I ask what this is for?

    Me: well theyre auctioning off a two night hotel stay with Rob. No joke. DREAM COME TRUE.

    Him: did he agree to this? If so he’s insane. Isnt he in love with this guy Tom Sturridge? I read an article online about it….

    I hung up after that. I was laughing so hard I was crying. What is my life anymore honestly. Oh, Rob and I would watch only the finest movies, id subject him to my favorites. I’ve been curious what he’d think of Mean Girls and Love Actually. Like a boss. I think the sexytime is implied. Duh.

  17. LatersBaby says:

    I put my eggs up for auction on ebay to make this happen.

    Unfortunately, my 40 year old eggs only have a current high bid of $11.28.

    So, since only four of us get a sit down with Rob, and the rest of us have to wait at the hotel room (I read the fine print), which four will have the best persuasive methods to get Rob to come back to the hotel room?

    We need to strategize ladies.

    • melronin says:

      Laters…greek girl needs explanations!
      Four will sit in the hotelroom…ok…
      Four will get a sit down with Rob…A SIT DOWN WITH ROB???
      Meaning what exactly???? And will all FOUR get this sit down with Rob simultaniously???

      Whaaaat???? A girl must know what she is gonna sell her business for ok????

      So…Laters..please…what’s the deal???

      • LatersBaby says:

        Mel,
        You’re killing me this morning! I meant “sit down” as another term for “meet and greet.” Only four people (the winner and three guests) get to meet Rob when visiting the set. Included in the package is a 2-day hotel stay.
        The fine print says that if Rob’s filming schedule doesn’t allow, you won’t get to meet him. Umm…yeah, right. Maybe, “If we think you are crazy, you won’t get to meet him.”

        Also, the fine print reads:
        “Causes for termination include but are not limited to: profanity, harassment, not following instructions of assigned escort or security as applicable, intoxication, taking unauthorized photos, or other codes of conduct which are considered unreasonable…”

        But really, let’s forget about all this fine print stuff. I’m killing the buzz. Let’s just think about what we would do with Rob, 2-days, and a hotel room.

        x

        • drsaka says:

          Darn that fine print!!!!!!

        • melronin says:

          Honi….I will work on that SITTING ON ROB part…okok…DOWN ON ROB part…pffff..will not sell my business for some fineprintshizzl….
          Seriously…Rob!!!

        • robgirl86 says:

          “Included in the package is a 2-day (…) stay”
          Sounds so dirty …in a good way!

        • roslynselene says:

          β€œCauses for termination include but are not limited to: profanity, harassment, not following instructions of assigned escort or security as applicable, intoxication, yadda yadda yadda…”

          Well then, at least we know Krisbians won’t be able to stay for long if profanity is forbidden. We all know where they get that mouth from.

          I don’t know. I just feel like getting thumbs-downed today. πŸ˜€ I haven’t gotten one for an awful long time. Where ya been, Janetrigs?

    • MidnightCougar says:

      @ LatersBaby: Well, you have made $11.28 more than I would have. My 40 yr old eggs are tied-up AND hardboiled. πŸ˜‰

  18. kristen's bestie says:

    Whilst in the hotel room…. a thorough investigation into the “bald” spot is needed to determine if it is in fact a bald spot or just the way his hair was parted. I would think it would not take too terribly long to come to a conclusion except that I (or Moon) would take extra time running our fingers through Rob’s hair.

  19. drsaka says:

    Generally, we all cringe at poor grammar, but in this case, IT’S FANTASTIC!!!!!!

    Give the person who wrote that a raise, RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!

  20. Janetrigs says:

    Oh Ron.

  21. Vera says:

    I Feel deep inside me the weird desire to take care of him.

    You know, give Rob a bath, trim his beard, change his clothes, food at his mouth. ItΒ΄s somewhat pervet, but anyways…

  22. Ms. J says:

    HAHAHA – I love you guys. God help our poor baby if any one of us wins.
    PS – remember to take pictures – LOTS OF PICTURES

    • roslynselene says:

      If one of us LTR girls win, we’d be the MOST normal out of all the other crazies outside. I bet Rob’s praying he gets an LTR girl. Lol

  23. Jamie says:

    So, Moon, UC….. any thoughts on asking Stephanie for a laon?

  24. eliebelle says:

    Yes, I already printed out the details and posted them on the fridge with a note to Santa about what a good girl I’ve been this year. Normal, right?

  25. roslynselene says:

    Sorry, Rob. I don’t think I’ll be able to spend two nights in a hotel for $20,000+. “I’m broke.”–Story of my life. πŸ™ But I’m still going to make you that ugly Christmas sweater. πŸ˜€

  26. MichaelSheenisaDILF says:

    I’d make him explain that footage of Edward and Bella doing the samba in the streets with the happy smiling natives. I don’t remember that shiz being in the book.

  27. Nelle says:

    Ladies- you do know, at best, it will be a handshake and hello to Rob, no nights in the hotel with Rob. Don’t hate me for saying it OUT LOUD.

  28. JennyluvsJax says:

    Hey I like the whole book a room where the group is staying in or near. It worked for the original cast of 90210 when they were trying to find their favorite band in a hotel. They met them at the coke machine. Can you imagine meeting Rob at the coke machine hoping you don’t crush the can in your hands from sheer delight. Then you just need a good line to get him hooked.

  29. southernbelle says:

    Ah shoot. I forgot you post on Wednesdays!!!! I’m so late now. πŸ™

    Anyway, 2 days with Rob? Wow, that would be a dream come true, I’ve got a list too but not sure if I’ll even have the strength to pull it out of my purse to go over it with him! I would hope we would never leave his hotel room :). Hey we can both go read Ltr, point out to him how important he is! We could go look at all the pics from Breaking Dawn and I’ll pepper him with question, why this, why that. That is if I can even speak.

    Then oh maybe we could rummage through his dirty clothes and find the black v-neck shirt….because we all miss that shirt and how HOT he makes it look. That and the holey blue jeans, and while we’re at it, the shiteous Nikes as well. I’ll even help him to clean it up. Oh and then perhaps darn some of his clothes that need darning (ie. Stoli shirt, wherever the heck it is). LOL

    Basically, whatever Rob wants from me, he shall receive!

    πŸ™‚

  30. southernbelle says:

    Unrealistic and fangirly but I will be tempted to do the same, cash 401K, savings, etc just to meet him LOL. But I’ll never tell him that I went through all that. Want my firstborn child Rob? Sure! lol

    And I’m kidding about the firstborn thing of course!

  31. Pattygirl says:

    What if Rob is not available, did Summit consult with Rob people before? the bidding is at 30,000 US$ now

    Off topic :

    People youngest Sexiest Man Alive was ….JFK JR at 28…I was just mentioning on another post that Rob has the same body type as him……bet Rob can beat that record nxt year as he promote BD …..usually SMA is related to a new project

    • roslynselene says:

      Are you kidding me?! Who’s bidding?! Oprah?!?! Do you know what I could do with $30,000? Me, spending THIRTY GRAND for a *possible* hand shake and mumbley hello from Rob? Hell no! If I ever do something for Rob that costs me more that $100, he better be prepared to marry me with no prenup. (Not that I’d EVER leave him but still…that’s the least he could do) SMH unbelievable. Sorry for the rant but seriously, my god. I’d rather meet him at some cheap bar, get him drunk, and take him home. For free!

      • Pattygirl says:

        if I had money to spare and since its for charity, I wd do it just for the fun of it…….

        • roslynselene says:

          Yeah, I guess I would too (if I had *a lot* of money to spare). I’m sorry I got so crazy. Lol It’s just thinking about what I could do with that money…yeah. And you know what else irks me a little? Rob has millions and barely touches it(but I admire that as well). I think he said that he’d prefer to be broke again. It almost makes me want to write a letter to him and ask him to give me all his money so I can get him out of his misery. Bhahahaha! πŸ˜€

  32. JennyluvsJax says:

    I swear future when you start thinking about Rob your whole brain goes by by. Cause you just start day dreaming. But I did love the whole Rob lips all over the coke bottle. Nice one!

    • robsfuturemate says:

      You should know how distracted I get with that name, you do it to me all the time!! But come on, with lips, fingers, jaw like that who could blame a girl! Besides, now that you come here you’ll see that it’s NORMAL!!!!

  33. natashadushi says:

    If I win the bid, do I have to pay my own ticket from Holland to Vancouver? * continues searching for some euro’s under the sofa and carpet*

  34. twmmy says:

    and the winner of the biding is…… Robert Pattinson, who can spend two night with RobPattz in his hotel room, and can have breakfast with him, and can go to the shooting with him.

  35. Brittany says:

    I am so jealous ! i couldnt even fathom two nights in a hotel room with rob im pretty sure if i was in a 20 ft radius of him i would hyperventilate hes so amazing :]

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