When you think of Rob….
Last night I had the extreme privileged of being a part of a virtual Christmas party called “Jewmas” because there were some Jews among us. It was basically a big chat/phone call with a group of friends that I’ve met through LTR. We had secret santas (this is one of my gifts from VickyB to the right – yep that’s you on a bear skin rug offering to make room for me AND Ryan Gosling- NICE) Anyway, it made me happy. And today I found myself looking at pictures from “Esplice”- our trip to LA this summer and just reminiscing about all the times I’ve had with these girls & other LTR/LTT gals and other people I’ve met and everyone that means so much to me. Little did I know that when I first saw you walk into the cafeteria & gasped at your beautifulness that this is what it would become. But it has. And as another example of what it’s become is down below in the form of a Jumping Rob ornament. Be jealous! (even the Jews without Christmas trees wanted this ornament)
All that to say, it made me really miss the times that we’ve had joint, big chats or long 100+ email threads talking about you. It hasn’t happened in awhile because #1- where the FREAK are you? And #2- life got busy. A lot of people who were obsessed wit you aren’t as much, or they manage their obsession better & keep it to a particular amount of time per day instead of letting it take over their lives (ding ding ding- that’s me!) and #3- it’s hard to find time. I blog late at night- sometimes it’s easier to do it at your own, but it’s lonely. Like are you under the impression Moon & I talk 1,000 times a day for hours on end? Well, we don’t. In fact, this past weekend we did not talk ONCE. I texted her as I was going to sleep Sunday night and commanded me never do that again. It sucked.
So today, I thought I’d try to get a little help from my friends. I put the feelers out there asking the question, “What do you, after X amount of months or years that you’ve been obsessing over him, think about Rob immediately when I say his name?”
But first, I get to answer. When I think of you, I immediately think:
-Where ARE you!? Why haven’t you done anything recently to make me laugh or make me gasp at your beautifulness? Are you going too appear in a santa suit to make up for all the time you’ve been missing?
-What’s it going to be like seeing you in Water for Elephants? Will it be good? Will it be like what (in my mind) was a flop like in Remember Me? Will it be totally different that I forget about you as Edward?
-And last, what are you getting Kristen for Christmas? No wait, I really don’t care!) Actually… I do care. Just because… I can’t picture it. You both have a TON of money, so if I were Kristen (a Krisbian just cried) I’d say “Robbie, I want a THOUGHTFUL gift (and also diamonds) and don’t spend a lot (except on the diamonds).” And while I think you could ask your sisters for help handle the expensive gift part, I don’t know about the sentimental. Have you thought about making her her very own Hot Pocket fort? What about making a video reenacting Jumping Rob in all sorts of bodies of water? You could jump in the Silver Lake reservoir in LA, the Pacific Ocean, the Gulf of Mexico, the English channel, your local YMCA swimming pool & there’s a 4 ft pond at my dad’s house that would be a great place for the grand finale! Just some thoughts…
So last night I took a look at who was online in my chat list & asked the question I just answered above. Here are some of the answers:
Brookelockart: I think of Jumping Rob. And Jumping Rob in everyone’s photos. And that even though I’m Jewish I really hope I get that damn Jumping Rob Christmas ornament. I will find a place to hang him. But seriously, I just don’t take him seriously. I mean, he had ONE sentence in that Water for Elephants trailer, and he sounded like Edward. I wasn’t wowed, and I wanted to be.
PrettySparklies: Well, I’m so new to Rob love that I’m still blinded, but…well, I try to think of a description and I just drool….then I think about his yummy beard and how I hope it comes back over his holiday and then I think about UT making fun of me for my homeless trucker Rob love and how we discovered the game “homeless or hipster” is real.
The fact that her train of thought about you, Rob, leads her to the came “Homesless or hipster” just made my week. Or perhaps my year.
Zephyersky: I think the word “absent.” But I still think hobolicious. And tonight I’m thinking about a Rob calendar just cause I’ve seen like 6 of them in the last couple days. I just asked my husband and he said “pasty white and annoying.” That’s nothing new. And my 7 year old daughter said, “Edward. Is there anything more?”
Pixie: 3 words: Sexy, Hands, Hair
She-who-cannot-be-name: I think hes a lil’ stuck up, but also I think he’s that way cuz the fandom has made him that way. He’s having to feel like he cant have any privacy, so he has his body guards. He can’t have privacy! Not with people wanting to F*ck him AND his girlfriend at the same time! And he’s just not as personal with his fans as much as he was before
RobButtonsBabe: I think he’s gonna make some fabulous movie beyond twi. Twilight, in my opinion, has held him back since there are 4 errr now 5 movies! I think he still need to grow as an actor. He’s good, but he’s still young and still technically newish to the acting world. But I think he will be FUCKING FANTASTIC in Water for Elephants. I’m not sure Bel Ami will do as well… And I would love to see him in an action flick! No joke- doing most of his stunts! I think he could.
Amber: (after about 2 minutes of thinking) I think he’s: adorkable, the pretty, and a bad dresser. Why was that so hard!?
and besides PrettySparklies, who is still pretty new to you (lucky!) Amber & Pixie were the only one who really responded in the same way that they probably would have 2 years ago when they were first introduced to you. Have their feelings not changed and the rest of ours have? Or was Amber’s delayed response because we’re so distracted anymore by Ryan Gosling in that new movie other things outside of you that it takes a second for us to “remember” all the reasons why we loved you in the first place? Reasons like hot pocket forts, bad style & bed head 24/7 that somehow got misconstrued as “sex hair!”
Okay, this will be near impossible to be organic since you’ve been thinking about it since I mentioned “the question” but discuss: What do you, after X amount of months or years that you’ve been obsessing over him, think about Rob immediately when I say his name?
Rudoloph Rob from Robnipulations which I just accidentally wrote as Ronipulations. Jumping Rob ornament (that turns into a magnet after the Christmas tree comes down!) made by Lili & stolen from Amber’s blog. They run Shack of Soul together. Go there!