Breaking It Down: we’ve been Incepted, Steve Irwin and tucked in shirts

Dear Rob,

Last night I got a few anxious texts and saw a bunch of tweets about you and an alligator. I didn’t know what was going on because my head was spinning to fast with thoughts of Chris Weitz on Twitter to find out. I just knew it’d be something UC and I would end up breaking down the next day. Soooo here we are…

The one where we try to Break It Down without even seeing it

look up Steve Irwin fanart for a good time!

Moon: dude have you seen the “alligator” pic yet? i havent even looked
UC: no! NO idea what it is
Moon: its the vanity fair cover! someone scanned the photos
UC: ohhhh with a hat? alligator!? why!?
Moon: i dont know… that’s what they do in new orleans?
UC: its’ for WFE right?
Moon: maybe he was doing a steve irwin memorial piece?
UC: hahahahhahaha
Moon: im sure he was a huge fan
UC: let’s discuss it before we even see it… pretend to be “Such rob experts” that we don’t even NEED To see the pictures to know the essence
Moon: DONE. we’re breaking it down without even SEEING the material, we’re this good (slash need a life)
Moon: so it’s probably been like what 5 years since the croc hunter was killed by a sting ray, so maybe he loved the show a lot. watched with his fam. and then wanted to do something to show his appreciation to bindi irwin and the fam

A LOT of time passes…

Are we being Incepted?

Moon: are you secretly looking at it?
UC:  yes i couldn’t wait ever since you texted me at 2 am I’ve been thinking about it.i couldn’t sleep, just waiting for this moment when I could look at the alligator
Moon: its true. i knew we would need to talk about it so i refused to look and went back to obsessively tweeting to and about Chris Weitz. true story
Moon: he tweeted a pic of his CUTE CUTE CUTE kid next to THE PANTS (not of the pattinson variety) and i was a goner
UC: NO!! THE PANTS? did he do that FOR US? this is true? or is this a dream? b/c it sounds like a dream next you’re gonna tell; me he has boxers that say DILF cuz that’s also a dream of mine

This is pretty much what's going on in our brains right now, only throw Rob in there too

Moon: maybe we have been Incepted because it was the pants AND Weitz on twitter AND some cute kid AND rob with an alligator… lots of dreams intersecting here
UC: I can’t tell what is a dream or reality. It’s all too good to be true
Moon: somewhere leo knew we needed some Inceptizing in our lives since November – most of February was SO boring
Moon: go to the photo and look at the 1st comment (it’s actually the 4thish now name: lynntribbsomething).  i may have left that….
UC: omg hahahhahahaha
Moon: isnt his kid freaking cute?
UC: omg that kid is cute
Moon: its like a mini chris
UC: put him next to a alligator and Imma goner
Moon: cause that’s safe.

The one where we finally get down to business
Moon: so back to rob…. id just like to add there was NO alligator/crocodiles in YENTL so this reptile is NOT acceptable for this photoshoot. Didn’t they read our initial Breakdown?
UC: Would a lizard be better?
Moon: no a goat or something. yentl is in poland not the swampy south. HELLO VANITY FAIR
Moon: ok so should we look now… OMG THERES A BUNCH! get ready… ok lets start with the cover…

Moon: OMGGGGG!!!!i die. literally i die laughing. im currently dying.
UC: hahha aOMG hahhaa no NOOOO oh poor Rob
Moon: is the hat on sideways?
UC: all the jokes…. I think it’s backwards… he will be RIPPED ALIVE by people who live to rip Rob alive
Moon: i mean his face is hot but theres an alligator near it
UC: this is unbelievable…i mean…. no… he has like.. a ranchers outfit on. that belt… BELT with jeans?? is he 47. don’t tell me he has white sneakers on too
Moon: he has a cell phone on the belt. the jitterbug is in a holster now
UC: his fingernails look manicured. his shirt- it’s too big
UC: who STYLED this???? a 200 year old man?
Moon: I KNOW!!! where’s the tailor?? or the photo shopper?

THIS could have been your cover Vanity Fair!! YOUR LOSE!

UC: photo shopper. STEP IN
Moon: i mean get any manip. creating rob fan on this and you’ll have him shirtless in 5 minutes with a 10pack and an oddly colored body… and tighty whities
UC: exactly. you know how everyone takes off the writing on images, the tags? shirt… gone pants gone. belt ON!!! just keep the belt on photoshoppers. belt on his undies
Moon: shoppers will make the alligator a weight bar for the nonstens and kstew for the robstens
UC: no seriously.. WHO thought this was a good idea?
Moon: ok, HE LOOKS HOT but everything ON him is not hot. it’s a lot of WHY? and is it irony that theres a title line on the cover that reads “the kid who brought chaos to the internet” uhhhhh GUILTY
UC: hahahahah GUILTY! another tagline:  “geeks gone wild” TRUE… geeks wear belted jeans & white tucked in shirts
Moon: so, the whole magazine is about him this month.

 

Sing us a song you're the piano man

The one where we make a lot of really bad band jokes
Moon:
ok palate cleanser….
UC: ohhhh hottttt that’s the Robbie we like. Piano. Fitted clothes. No white sneaks
(please photoshop Rob in a pair of super white sneakers… do it to this picture)
Moon: the shirts still too big but he can wet my reed anytime!
UC: hahaha
Moon: HOLLER WOODWIND JOKES!!!
UC: you’re such a h00r. hahha
Moon: i love the clarinet just artfully laying on top of the piano. WHY? id rather have rag time robbie playing the upright… there’s also half a sousaphone/tuba laying down there. now THAT would be sexier than the cover and white sneakers. rob playing a sousaphone!
UC: YES hahahah ps.. back to the front cover it said something about “Robert Wresltes out of the twilight saga” wrestles so i think the thought was .. he’s wrestling an alligator but… i’d rather see him wrestle a sousaphone or a big ass tuba
Moon: yes
UC: or me
Moon: that’d make for better cover and who doesnt find a sousaphone player sexy?!
UC: i’d really rather see him wrestle me…right. I do
Moon: again with the band jokes!
UC: haha duh dum ching
Moon: think about him wearing the little beret all the sousaphone players wore… big puffed cheeks. twilight written on the side of the instrument… him wrestling it
UC: is it hot in here?
Moon: it is or maybe it’s just the hot air coming from the tuba
.

The one where we guess what Rob is…

Which way to the petrol station?

Moon: alright lets move right along
on the wrong side of the car again i see…. america is so confusing
Moon: so where do we think he’s driving to?
UC: A zoo or maybe to in-n-out
Moon: a steve irwin museum… maybe bindi irwin’s new live show? to pick tom stu up for a swamp boat tour? on his way to get those clothes tailored?
UC: let’s hope
Moon: Rob’s going to *insert joke i made that shall not be repeated because we like to live and we’ve had enough hatemail to last a lifetime*
id like to think thats really what he’s doing
UC: me too!!!
Moon: seriously
Moon:  i wish i could read the text on the scan better… something about “forget the relationship with kristen stewart – robert pattinson is blah blah blah
UC: Let’s fill in the blank…
Moon: Ok, “”forget the relationship with kristen stewart – robert pattinson is……”
UC: “DTF with anyone”
“IN love with his stuffed alligator?
“A fan of all sorts of reptiles?”
Moon: “secretly president of the reptiles of the world club”
“a WOMAN”
UC: “really into stark white sneakers”
“Gay”

TUCK it in! (you knew I would!)

Moon: “loves to tuck stuff in”
UC: “in love with these two bloggers”
hahaha THE TUCK
UC: “loves to tuck stuff in as proved in Little Ashes”
Moon: “secretly wishing he was chris weitz”
UC: “Really jealous of Chris Weit’z mustard pants”
Moon: “is confused about how real cell phones work”
“is wondering whether he really is team edward or team jacob… they are impressive abs”
Moon: “is wondering how dry cleaning works. if it’s dry and there’s not soap….”
UC: “How the Oscars made him sing a song he never recorded”
Moon: HAHAHA

Where's cousin Larry?

The one where we almost call this the worst
Moon: alrighty last but defs not least (weird)
UC: waiting for his kosher pickle… he gets one at the end of each day. like SERIOUSLY?
Moon: it’s like Balki got lost at the train station in Mypos…..
UC: his mom… the modeling agent is gonna have a heart attack: “My poor baby has been RUINED” someone deserves to get FIRED over this one!
Moon: he looks mid sentence… she did NOT teach this pose at the barbazon / john robert powers modeling school in Barnes!
UC: no she did NOT
Moon: she taught the “swish and swirl” and the “look, smolder, dazzle” but NOT the “midsentence” modeling pose
UC: amen
Moon: why do these clothes look so hick?! and not even GOOD hick? i could dismiss hick if he were wearing wranglers and boots and was all hot cowboy-ed out.
UC: it’s the WORST PHOTOSHOOT EVER
Moon: WOAH WOAH THERE! i think you’re forgetting zigot rob…. let’s not jump the gun on “worst ever!!” We have come a LONG way. this is may be the ODDEST ever…
UC: hahhaha yes you’re right. sorry. I apologize
Moon: its alright we’re all a bit confused and scared: alligator rassler, rag time robbie, hanging in a car rob and lost hick/preacher boy… what do these things have in common???

Hey guys, I just had the best idea for a photoshoot with Rob Pattinson!

UC: vanity fair, so sure that this issue will be a best seller because it’s ROB, putting forth no effort/money/quality?
Moon: they should know the POWER of a vanity fair photoshoot. i mean it created US!! we started because of their first twi spread/BTS video. and they phone it in with this oddness?
UC: right….. i mean.. this is probably one, if not THE last during the twi craziness…. they end it with THIS?
Moon: he is super hot and i can see why they just feel like anything goes, but still?!  they didnt even get naked girls or bathtubs like Details mag. at least get some local baton rouge “working girls” to spice things up
UC: Breaking it Down Vanity Fair style just changed to Breaking it Down “Down home, alligator wrangling” style
Moon: “breaking it down TUBA style”
“breaking it down belted denim with too large shirt and dad phone style”
Moon: man i think i gotta make a run to the news stand at lunch… across from the chateau marmot… how apropos
UC: i hope Robsten is there making magic
Moon: i hope i can see a glimpse of a bearskin rug
UC: i think you can. I heard that you can see it
Moon: *insert another joke i made that shall not be repeated because we like to live and we’ve had enough hatemail to last a lifetime*
UC: hahahahahhahahahahahah
Moon: i’ll bring my super telephoto lens the one that helps show them holding wrists

Really Rob, an alligator? Weird. But dude those eyes? Like WOAH! And don’t you worry I will trek my happy lil arse BACK down to the news stand again tomorrow to gaze at the chateau for the bearskin rug see if the magazine came in.

RIP Steve Irwin!
Themoonisdown

UPDATE: According to the news stand guy who called his distributor if you’re in LA you can get Alligator Rasslin’ Rob Vanity Fair TODAY!

So what are your thoughts? Loving the alligator? Asking a lot of WHY’s? But how hot is he?! Those eyes!

Source: Robsessed via epnebelle via Pattinson Ladies

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

 

169 Responses to “Breaking It Down: we’ve been Incepted, Steve Irwin and tucked in shirts”

  1. Ambella says:

    all that…..and I still want it. Have any of you read the article (it’s online a few places) it’s so sad:-(

    • Yes, the article made me worry about Rob. He truly seems to be getting fed up of all the madness around him. Makes me want to feed him more chocolate covered pretzels and give him a hug. Such a sweet person.

    • minuit_passe says:

      Was troubled by the interview too.

      Kinda went from this is why I like this guy to sad to see his loneliness and insecurities to WTF dude. Like from wanting to hug him & sit down for a drink (no, I mean seriously this time, WHY don’t you believe me?), to” wait, aren’t I being an exasperating fangirl” to nevermind, “dude stop the over introspection of HANDWRITING, passed highschool it may just come off as some exaggerating egocentrism in a printed interview. Also be happy at least you didn’t go into politics, that’s one thing that could be more violent than the fangirls. Plus with all that danger protection speech in one single interview, not sure you’d like your new fans in politics.”
      I want to take him by the hand (by the HAND I said) and tell him he’d have his share of frustrations & downs & career/life interrogations whatever he would have done, like any interesting not dumb person (outside his bubble) who thinks and evolves and doesn’t want to do one thing his whole life.
      Yep the thing was on my mind for so long that I actually went through all the states from “Awww Rob” to “dude just grow up and spare some energy for the next mini depressions”. Currently at the “Why yes I am being emo cheesy state.”

      • JellyBeanRainbow says:

        Me too, still confused : get over it, your life is great, Rob OR wanna-hold-your-wrist-poor-lonely-boy-etc

      • robgirl86 says:

        I agree on many points you are saying, but had as well the lil impression that he acually has NO chance to grow & prove himself..
        every step he makes gets interpreted and valued and commented…by people he doesn’t know and doesn’t want to know…not easy to deal with ..the bubble has to burst, so to speak.

      • GoodgirlgonePlaid says:

        LTR Intervention!

    • southernbelle says:

      I felt the same about the article, it got me worried and sad.

    • “I get a lot of people wanting to beat me up. Men in bars and stuff. I just leave.” He shrugs. <— WTF is wrong with this world? This makes me feel like crying. Poor, poor Rob :(

    • Janetrigs says:

      Thumbs down for wanting it. NO ONE wants it more than, that one blog we used to read every day…..don’t ask.

    • we’ve heard this and gotten a few emails about. so uc said we’ll read it today/tomorrow and then discuss.

      i dont like to think about sad rob! i’ll give him and that dog MARTIN a hug!

  2. haha, thanks for the laugh girls! I’ve been MIA from LTR for a while so I think I missed a few posts but this Breaking it Down was as hilarious as ever.

    I also couldn’t make up my mind about the cover and the pictures with the hat on so I was worried if that made me a bad Rob fan. Just because I did not die over ALL the pics of VF shoot, does that mean I need to hand over my fan card? Thank you for making me feel normal and sane.

  3. natashadushi says:

    Crocodile dundeeRob is not my thing….sorry Rob. You on a bearskinrug THAT is my thing. xxxx

  4. minuit_passe says:

    yes the pinky lipstick gayness & the romantic joke pose is a good laugh, maybe just as good as ‘we heard a desperate cry “Rob I JUST want to touch your hair”.

    • natteringyeahrobber says:

      I felt second hand embarrassed for myself when I realized I could have easily been the “I just want to touch your hair” yelling woman. The only reason it wasn’t me is because that dude never comes to San Francisco/within 385 miles of me.

      I’ve wanted to yell it out loud from time to time, though. At work meetings, on the bus, as a random dinner comment, in line at the grocery store, yah, pretty much any time I think about Rob and/or his hair.

      • the diff is we never actually end up saying it out loud. (SAY IT!). we may think it ALL THE TIME but it doesn’t come out. this is what separates us from the animals (aka crazy rob fans)

        • natteringyeahrobber says:

          98% of me knows I would not yell “I wanna touch your hair” should he ever be anywhere near my vicinity. And even if I did it would come out as a tiny squeeky cat-toy noise, right before I fainted.

          But 2% of me thinks I might do the crazy yelling mega-second-hand embarrassing fan thing. But don’t worry, I wouldn’t mention LTR as they are hauling me away to the “bad list” holding cell. I will not sully your good name! :)

          • maggie says:

            I think I’ve posted this before (not that its about two highlights of my pathetic little life or anything), but I’ve been in His Presence twice. Both times from quite a distance. Both times I turned into a stone statue. Not able to move, not able to breathe. I don’t think I could ever meet him. Based on the above, I would most likely go into catatonic shock. No worrying about any screaming, annoying fangirling here.

      • JustGoWithIt says:

        I would love to be somewhere that he also was, but I think I’ve learned my lesson a few times over with being around famous people. I’ve seen my share in person, and when you embarrass yourself and make things awkward nobody wins. I mean, just very tame asking for an autograph or running up to people to get a good look, no asking for permission to grope. When I was a teenager my boyfriend and I were walking out of a coffee shop and saw the young actress from “Life Goes On” Kellie Martin, and Kirk Cameron (I think it was anyway, or someone like him) walking up the street smoking and drinking to go coffee and we ran up the them in a way that couldn’t be passed off as casual, and then we’re standing there in front of them, like what do we do now, and he’s all “can I shake your hand, I such a big fan”. Um, of Kirk Cameron? Really?
        They awkwardly shifted cigarettes and coffees to shake hands, see I didn’t ask for the grope!
        Anyway a lot better to act respectfully and keep cool. I’ve ended up having normal conversational exchanges that way.

        • natteringyeahrobber says:

          Good story. And LOL. “I’m a huge fan of yours….HUGE…wait can you just remind me who you are again? Kirk, right?” (j/k)

          I usually have no problems acting cool around celebrities – and “cool” is usually me doing nothing, unless they talk to me first (which has only happened because I was “the help”). I’ve wished I’ve had the balls to ask for autographs, but I’ve never had the courage to do that. Missed opportunities…

          But I’ve never been near Rob, he’s basically the only celebrity I’ve ever had a crush on. So I’m just not sure how I’d react. I’d love to think I could be cool/catatonic. But it would probably be my only chance of ever seeing him, so something really embarrassing might come out (“I brought a watermelon!”). Aloud.

          • JustGoWithIt says:

            I know what you mean, I’ve never met a celebrity I had a crush on. I worked somewhere upscale, and lots of celebrities came in, mostly women, with some men taking their women shopping. I’ve never had a crush on Robin Williams or the older blond kid from Home Improvement. Or any of the lawyers from Ally McBeal. And so on. A friend of mine got to hang out with Rob and friends and got a awe you’re going now hug from Rob. I hadn’t really discovered Twi yet, had seen the first movie but had not read the books yet, so it didn’t mean much to me at the time, but wow that is a good Rob encounter.

    • che says:

      hey @MP i know this is OT but i must ask u something..when i was a kid at early 90′s i used to watch some tv shows and i just found & found out that 2 of them were French tv series
      so i’m wondering if those series really were popular at France too …or just were aired at Turkey without being hit :D (u know it’s possible cuz till 1990 there was no private tv channels in TR)
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfPKb5g6Gcc

  5. JellyBeanRainbow says:

    No, just say NO next time, Rob.
    But at least we got a funny letter out of it, again.

    PS Read Lainey’s stand on this, I agree 100%

    • JennB33 says:

      linky?

    • robgirl86 says:

      I don’t like this lainey woman, she talked crap about him for 2 years & even if she’s right that this shoot wasn’t a good one..well can happen, but it’s still A.L. and not some unknown photographer. I have no clue if these people talk about their shoot ideas before and I can see that she TRIED with an 1930…thing, ok, it didn’t work, happens..BUT Lainey calling now out his “talent” after she talked 2 entire years about his “hips”…well..makes me just say one thing:
      NO to Lainey..sorry, you’re late to the partee girl!

      • Keisha says:

        I do effing love the “LOOK AT HIS TEA POURING HANDS” quote though.

      • ladyofthemeadow says:

        I don’t especially like Lainey either. She just likes to talk crap to get a rise out of people, and creates controversy to increase readership of her web site. She can be quite funny, but not this time. Just ignore her, I figure.

      • Vivi says:

        Liing Layne makes me a bad Rob fan?

        Anyway, I agree with all of you that think that this VF cover is LAME. Even Rob, after seeing this, most have cringed.

        I still love him, though.

        About Lainey – I do not always agree with her, but she has a unbiased view, and she’s very honest too (at least that’s what I usually get from her writing). And that’s sorta okay, because sometimes we need some different perspective. Not everybody has to like the same things ( and she used to be much more snarky about Rob, now she seems to be warming up to him lol )

        And you kow what? She DOESN’T trash him really, she doesn’t talk dirt just because he’s RPATZ, vampire guy (and I’m using the awful nichname here this “media persona” is who the haters hate on). She has her opinion and she owns it quite nicely too. And I respect that.

    • Pattygirl says:

      I been reading lainey related rob post, she is definitely team rob, she loves him eventhough she is snarky on the situation surrounding him.

    • i feel like lainey is secretly a big rob fan but like us has to cut him down from time to time cause it’s just all so ridiculous

  6. dazzledtodeath says:

    My husband called last night to say he’d gotten it, and I waited with baited breath (not really-I’d already seen it), hoping it would be, well, better up close and personal. Sadly, it’s not. Rob is hot-in almost any situation, Rob is hot. This is a given, but knowing what he can do-see 2009 GQ, 2010 VF and Details-this photoshoot was just..disappointing. Yes, Rob himself is hot, what we can see of him under the hat, baggy clothing and alligator but all in all it’s just..meh. I even pulled out last year’s VF and it still has the power to make drool start pooling in my mouth. I say get Bruce Weber next time.

    Also disappointing is that this is the only photoshoot I’ve heard of for WFE. Why?? This is a highly-anticipated movie, with great word of mouth-why??

    Let’s not even get started on the interview.

    • melronin says:

      I wish I could at least see a lil relation to WFE!!!
      Sadly I can’t….

      • dazzledtodeath says:

        I know…how hot could this have been if they’d done a 30′s movie star b & w photoshoot to tie in with WFE? Rob is so beautiful, he’s a photographer’s dream..you must have to try to make a picture of him look meh. I just couldn’t connect with this photoshoot.at.all.

        • melronin says:

          My thoughts exactly!
          I expected Annie to do a much better job…she had Rob there to work with and THIS is what she came up with??? WTF!!! I get that Rob is in bad shape but I think it’s the photographers genious to get passed all this and capture the persons personality! She failed badly here and as much as I usually like her work…this is not even Rob being sad or pissed or frustrated…this is just…blank!

        • robsfuturemate says:

          Maybe those are 30′s instruments but that’s about it. Hopefully this is not the only thing to pull WFE. New trailer coming out soon, right?

  7. melronin says:

    I don’t know if it is my emo greek dramaqueen soul but as hard as I tried since yesterday to find Rob in those shots I couldn’t! He looks totally off place there and either A.L. could bot capture him at all…and honestly I did not even get her concept…or he did not want to be captured. I just see a gorgeous man and nothing else!
    Rob isn’t even there….

    Sorry Annie…sorry Rob…

    As for the interview…

    Rob baby

    I think you could not say it louder or clearer. This is a
    huge “F*** off…gimme a break” scream! I get it and I hope the fandom will get it too.
    You killed me with that “I can’t write any more” seriously.
    Rob…I need you back…preferably without any alligator around your neck!
    For the time being I will just be emo with you!

    <3

  8. robgirl86 says:

    Dear Rob
    what you said made me feel for you, it was actually the first time that you sounded this sad & off & I’m not able to make jokes about it. You are looking forward to great projects and seems like BD is almost wrapped, so hang in there baby, all has an end, even Summit’s franchising and their “team projects”(how idiot..)
    The crazies may focuss on somebody else soon, Edward will be forgotten, but not you! ( Consider that the 15/16y old teens I know do NOT know who the hell is Britney Spears!)
    so I leave you with this:

    “Hollywood is a place where they’ll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul.”
    Marilyn Monroe (1926 – 1962)

    Dunno why but I like it, reminds me of a film you used to watch.
    Love <3 & always supporting you,
    me

    P.S. The shoot is as good as usually AL shoots are, the idea doesn't fit to your persona in my opinion & honestly you didn't manage this time to deliver "the sexy" , BUT I cannot blame you, because I totally don't care about shoots at all.

    • robgirl86 says:

      is NOT as good as….<—–of course…

    • melronin says:

      I love the Marilyn Monroe quote…and she surely knew what she was talking about!

      xoxo

    • Brenn says:

      I read the article and I am worried about our boy. I’m hoping he was just having an emo kind of day– I pray the craziness doesn’t get the best of him.

      Dear Rob –
      Hang in there. It’s got to die down soon. In the meantime remember all the LTR girls love you and only want the best for you. We are totally on your side.

      Brenn

    • dazzledtodeath says:

      This interview stayed with me all day yesterday. I heard comments that people didn’t want to hear Rob whine and complain b/c he makes so much money, he wanted this, etc. Ok-yes, he wanted to act,yes, he took the role of Edward, yes, he does make a ridiculous amount of money BUT I don’t think this means he signed away his soul. He is unfailingly gracious when approached respectfully, but many fans are not at all respectful. Screaming in his face, touching (I remember a fan bragging about pulling out his arm hair when he was in TX-WTF?) obstructing him or his car are not respectful and are probably pretty scary. Hearing that he’s so wary of fans that he hates going through airports and holes up in a hotel is just sad, and certainly no way to live. His situation is not that of a typical celebrity and maybe this interview is somewhat of a plea to stop the crazy behavior and let him breathe. He’s made it clear that making movies isn’t something he necessarily has to do-I’d hate for crazy fans to be the thing that tips the balance against it.

      Rob is only human (really, he doesn’t sparkle or drink blood) and everyone has a breaking point. Give the man room to breathe and have a little common sense and decency. Try it crazy people/ stalkers/hackers who make Rob’s life miserable.

      • dazzledtodeath says:

        also, I didn’t think the interviewer did a particularly great job. Why are you still beating the R*sten thing to death? he’s not going to answer, he didn’t answer, but VF had to plaster a quote that contained her name across Rob’s picture. This interview should have focused more on WFE and future projects, instead of just a few lines. I also wonder if Rob was as down as he sounds in it, or if the interview was manipulated to make it sound that way.

        It seems like the interviewer rehashed a lot of old stuff. Rob usually gives great interviews-was this one rushed, was he having an off day..? Idk.

        • robgirl86 says:

          good point, it’s still printed stuff and since we cannot see his face by being quoted, dunno, BUT I think she gave him space to answer and maybe he had a bad mood, day whatever..still it made me sad, especially the hints about what he didn’t say, or the dog thing.
          As for the shoot, every pic lives on the “feeling” the person has with the camera you can photoshop as much as u like, if there is NO feeling, it delivers the pic!

      • southernbelle says:

        Sigh I know that’s sad isn’t it? Rob’s entitled to vent just like one of us. Life isn’t perfect just because you’re famous.

    • che says:

      RG Marilyn quote
      WİN WİN WİN
      u are the best
      xo

    • Janetrigs says:

      Thumbs down because I loved your MM quote.

    • Vera says:

      Love MM quote.

      Madness that MM was the first I thought after reading.

  9. Libby says:

    *standing ovation* Bravo! Bravo!

    BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

    Thank you girls! best laugh ever!

  10. Katie S says:

    Oh heavens. Still hilarious. Imma go grab my mint julep, sit on the porch swing, and re-read.

  11. allryans says:

    Two words:

    Retarded virgin.

    (Most unPC comment ever).

  12. robsfuturemate says:

    Makes me question whether or not to let this be my first Rob mag I buy. Haven’t read the article (or your comments about it). Was hoping to save it til I had the mag. Oh the drama, what to do?!?!

    • roslynselene says:

      That’s exactly what I was going to say. I was saving myself from seeing the pictures and reading the article until I got the mag but after reading the comments, I don’t think I’ll be buying it. Depressed Rob, no gracias. I’m sad already just by reading the comments alone. :( :( :(

      Sorry Rob,
      I won’t be buying this. (And I was SOOOOOO excited and looking forward to this! But I don’t think I even want to read your interview. It’s too sad and I don’t want to be sad all week.) :( {HUGS} <3

      • southernbelle says:

        Hey girl, you should still read it, you don’t have to buy if you don’t want to. It’s online on some blogs. He’s still hot no matter what, I’ll still buy it. Remember how you regret now having the one from last year lol.

        • roslynselene says:

          I’ve just finished reading the interview. I shouldn’t have and I knew it would be sad but…IT’S SO FUCKING SAD! :( I don’t know what to do anymore with this guy. He just wants to be left alone. And I WILL leave him alone if he stays like this forever. There ya go, Rob! There’s the thing to make me leave you alone. My kryptonite is your depression; it kills me.
          I shouldn’t let his sadness get to me, though. I need to cheer up and do something else.

  13. JennB33 says:

    The break down made me cry with laughter, but the comments about the article might make me cry for reals. I haven’t gotten my copy yet – maybe tonight? – but I look forward to the read.

    Gotta say I think the concept is interesting, but the execution is truly laughable. I hope this isn’t where A.L. and Rob jump the shark, or the alligator, as the case may be. A.L. is an amazing photographer – the Hollywood issue cover was amazing – but this looks to be lacking. On all fronts. I hope the article carries it, but I’m skeptical.

    Although I will give major props for shooting something on location and having it available on newsstands 2 weeks later. I work in magazine publishing and that is kind of a miracle.

    • The Old One says:

      I was wondering about that, if they rushed it a bit? This is the April issue, coming out March 1st? Is that normal? The article refers to everything as if it were the end of April (Rob’s birthday “next month”, WFE “coming out this month” etc.)

      • natteringyeahrobber says:

        I actually subscribe to VF and all my issues come SUPER late. Like, I just got the March issue today (March 2nd), I’ll probably get the April issue with Rob a month from now. So for subscribers (who are always the last to receive), the May references will make sense.

        Reminds me though that I need to cancel VF. I really want this Rob issue, but lately they’ve been too scattered in terms of writing and coverage. Sort of like the Oscars, where they are clearly grasping for an younger audience but are not sure how to do it, so they take the weirdest most bi-polar approach possible (some articles are stuffy & overedited, others are ridiculous & in need of severe editing).

        • The Old One says:

          Frankly, I thought the problem was not with what Rob said but with the interviewer’s slant. One, they probably took everything he said out of context to make it sound like he’s lonely and confused, and secondly, it would have been much more interesting to have Rob expound on some of the things he said, instead of just speculating on what he meant and jumping to another subject.

          • natteringyeahrobber says:

            Yah, the questions were not the best. Agreed. But Rob gave good responses, considering the questions. Real, honest. He’s never the type to put suntan lotion on when it is raining outside, you know?

      • JennB33 says:

        It’s a smidge early, but usually the trend is to get your magazine out early. I work for a bi-monthly and our next issue is dated May/June but it starts to hit homes by 4/14.

        I suspect VF/Conde Nast wants to sell magazines – probably the Bieber issue was a flop with their demographic – and what sells magazines better than our guy?

        Pity it looks like fluff on the cover.

  14. thebonfire says:

    that interview made me sad too. In fact, I dreamed last night that I saw him somewhere and no one else noticed him and I just left him alone because I knew he didn’t want any attention. So unfair! If I’m going to dream about him, I should at least get to make out with him in it!

    I don’t find him ungrateful for his success. He just wants to live his life. that part about going to bars and guys wanting to beat him up about broke my heart.

  15. robsfuturemate says:

    I like the thought of Rob DTF
    with me
    on an alligator skinned rug
    cause apparently he’d like that.

  16. southernbelle says:

    Moon: ok, HE LOOKS HOT but everything ON him is not hot. it’s a lot of WHY? and is it irony that theres a title line on the cover that reads “the kid who brought chaos to the internet” uhhhhh GUILTY

    I totally agree! I just ended up focusing on his face and his hands :). What beautiful hands he’s got.

  17. southernbelle says:

    I haven’t read everyone’s comments yet. Anyway the interview got me worried and sad for Rob. I know he’s a big movie star and all, but he seems to be hurting and in some instances, lost. He’s only human after all. I think that article sums his thoughts and feelings.

    I had a visual of those fans clawing at the window, in TN was it? That’s humiliating & that’s too bad he has to deal with that. I know it’s all part of being famous but I think it gets too much sometimes. I hope he has some outlet for this madness.

    I know, I know, someone’s thinking, geez SB what a drama queen. Fine.

    Dear Rob,

    Just hang in there and I wish you the best! I wish I could do more for you. You’re a great person and so down to earth. It’ll be over someday, this madness, I hope.

    Love,
    Me

  18. JennB33 says:

    Also I am digging the type over the crotch. Like we need help checking out his package!!

  19. Cazza says:

    Firstly, don’t hate too much………..

    I don’t know if I’m the only one but Rob really irked me in this article with what he said. I wanted to slap him. I know some of the fans can be a pain in the arse but hey, he is earning a shit load of money for all this trouble. Rather be unemployed? Hhhmmm, let me think about that whilst looking at my bank account.

    Rob you have obviously been spending too much time in the States. Time for a break, get on a plane and head across the pond for a break. It’s time to adopt that stiff upper lip and Best of British attitude and get on with it. There are many struggling actors that would die to be in your shoes.

    x

    • roslynselene says:

      I’m with you on that one.

    • Janetrigs says:

      <<<——— HATING TOO MUCH

    • robgirl86 says:

      …just one thought………..eating a burger and being on CNN or sitting in a pub in Lubbock (wherever this place may be, I have no clue) and people screaming EDWARD through some open window…dunno..seems to be his daily reality and NO eception…he always talked about places where Twi was unknown, seems like these places aren’t existing anymore…freedom has no price..and there is no other celeb who lives this, many of his (famous) collegues stated that they never saw such craziness following Rob like … at all.

      • Cazza says:

        I don’t disagree with you on that part. I just think in that other parts of the article, he came across as a whinny girl. Or the article was worded that way, anyway.

        Another thought to consider, it appears that it is only the States that he gets this level of attention in a crazy “we will break windows to get to touch you Rob”. Or maybe we are just more reserved in Britain and will look from afar – I’d be happy with just that.

        x

  20. Vera says:

    In my opinion the cover picture is pretty hot. His eyes talk wary in defiance.

    The cover pic reads -Hi everyone, do you really know me? I am an ordinary guy, but I´d rather wrestle with an alligator instead to fight an unfair battle.

    The interview- As for Twilight Saga the worst is yet to come. Who knows what might had happened?

    As for his emotional status, he is afraid of his future in Hol, unsure of his potential as an “ultra-realistic” actor. He is a twenty-five-yo person not a marketing product.

  21. Robsessedgirl says:

    I haven’t read the article yet but…seriously guys? I LOVE THIS SHOOT! i don’t know what’s wrong with it. it was done by Annie Leibovitz who certainly knows what she’s doing. I’ll be buying it tomorrow most likely. I’m afraid the article will make me sad, but I’ll read it anyway. let’s just be thankful that it was an alligator draped around him, not SOMEONE else. I think you know who i’m talking about.

  22. che says:

    u lost me at C.Weitz’s kid’ pic..so cuteeeeee

  23. GoodgirlgonePlaid says:

    Moon I love that you said Arse not Ass <3
    That little boy is ADORABLE!!
    RobsButtonsBabe – you are genius & made me honk with laughter. That manip got me a required – 'are you Alright' look. Oh I love you Ltr, Rob needs to read & get his secret smile on too!x

  24. Katie S says:

    p.s. – What’s with all the thumbs downing on this site now? When did the love disappear? sad face.

    Dear Rob,

    Let’s run away together. Leave the alligator at home. Bring Martin, the dog.

    Love,
    me

    • roslynselene says:

      IDK, I think there’s a lurker thumbsdowning people. TammyO? Although I’ve only heard of her and never got to experience her wrath.

    • southernbelle says:

      The kids got out early today and are playing on Ltr, thumbs downing everyone.

    • Janetrigs says:

      Do I need to thumbs down everyone again so you get desensitized? Srsly, REAL people come out and express their opinions rather than thumbs down when they disagree. In fact that is what Blogging is all about. SO don’t take it personally. Just know there’s always love from Moon and UC. All that matters.

      AND Thumbs Down for questioning the thumbs downinging

    • JennB33 says:

      Is that his dog’s name (read it on Perez that he adopted a puppy?) If so: WIN because that is my maiden name!!!!

    • kristen's bestie says:

      Hi *waves* It’s just Jane, she’s harmless! In fact I smiled when I saw her, she has been gone for awhile. Don’t take it personally….. and now…. bring on the thumbdowns!

  25. TheSnuggler says:

    Ok so we get that Annie is showing him with the Beast of Fandom weighing heavily on his shoulders. The trouble with being in the ‘over 21′ department of Robworld is that we worry about him. And now we’re really sad about how stressed out he is. If he’s like this now what on Earth will it be like when he’s doing the publicity for BD1 and 2? Time for a holiday, mate! I suggest you get the pals together and head to Bhutan for 6 months. Would it help him or me if I left the fandom, I ask myself? Then I look at the photo of him at the piano, my heart melts all over again and I can’t. But I promise not to knock on the window!

  26. ladyofthemeadow says:

    An alligator. Why?

    Didn’t his agent Stephanie step in and put the kibosh on this ridiculousness? Or is she on maternity leave already? (maybe her baby will have a cameo role in BD?!)

  27. roslynselene says:

    I’m having mixed feelings towards Rob. I don’t know if I should feel sorry for him (and I DO!) or if I should tell him to, “Suck it up! There are worse things than 12 y/o batshit crazy fans.” I know I’m being a selfish brat when I say: THIS IS NOT THE ROB I FELL FOR AND I WANT ROB BACK! I didn’t fall for Edward Cullen, I fell for Rob. Edward Cullen was too depressed for me and Rob was just the opposite. I fell for Rob because of his witty, hilarious, and happy personality. :sigh: But if he’s going to be acting like his Edward role in real life, count me out of this. I’m a terrible fan, I know and I feel horrible. I don’t like being sad this early in the day (or at all. I’m not a sad person. Darn you Robert for making me feel emotions!). :(

    • Cazza says:

      I’m with you girl.

    • roslynselene says:

      I didn’t know one person (other than Janetrigs) could thumbs down multiple times. And if it’s not just one person, what did I say that deserves a “Rob Hates This”? I really want to know.
      @Cazza, thanks for the 4 thumbs up. ;) LMAO :D

  28. Keisha says:

    I can’t even comment. I’ll come off as a heartless, bandwagon bitch. I just want the beautiful man that used to laugh at everything back. That is who I became a fan of.
    And Gos Bless pianos.

  29. Janetrigs says:

    I wish you could have brought the drama, Moon. Even though it’s Wednesday, I was ready to go balls to the wall and get called a yeasty B/See you in Toledo. Oh well. You know I like to argue.

    PS Ron looks weird.

  30. southernbelle says:

    Psst. I think I’m printing that manip picture of Rob. That ought to cheer me up.

  31. Bea says:

    Annie Lebowitz was obviously not at the top of her game that day.

  32. Pattygirl says:

    i am still waiting for anne explanation about that cover, why anne, u have such a beautiful subject???

  33. Janetrigs says:

    Thumbs Down for absolutely no reason what so ever. No really, I just wanted to do it and can’t even make up a reason why.

  34. LadyN says:

    …but can he carry an elephant??? THAT is the question.

    Thank god both of his heads are intact! Next time we can totes get the tighty whitey shot and rainbows! :-D sewww exsighted!!!

    Ps. The interview made me sooo sad :-( imma pray for him, he needs a hug and a hot pocket. :-(

    • Ambella says:

      dude…..I was just thinking “is it wierd if I give a little shout out to JC on his behalf?” I am normal. I am normal.

      • LadyN says:

        Srsly! He needs a bit of Haysoose love in his life. Or a hobby idk. I end up saying a lil prayer for celebs that are just nuts right now LOL I can’t help it.

        He can’t just sit around and mope. I’d go into nightclubs and play piano in a friends band with a hoodie on and jam out where noone will ever know its him. Something! anything but mope.

        He worries me. :-/ and the chain smoking! lordy.

        I think that interviewer caught him on a bad day and it totes reflected on this interview.

        PLUS! Where are all the questions that matter? like What do you think about Fuck yeah Rob Meme? or What do you think about Fanfiction? or Did you find anything else to nuke in the micro besides hot pockets? I mean… idk. Something!

        That interviewer was CLEARLY not in the Rob loop. What a fail.

  35. Pattygirl says:

    and i definitedly buy the mag rose, whats not to like? the pics are eyecandy, the article is indepth, wish it was longer and more pics.

  36. The Old One says:

    UC and Moon, I think the mustard pants and the kid got lost in the alligator wrestling match here. They need a whole breakdown, maybe over on LTT? I want to see your take on the fake newscast CW tweeted about, with the Twilight-loving al-Quaeda guy.

  37. natteringyeahrobber says:

    Wow, not even 9 yet and already 86+ postings. Holy crap!

    In any event, I read the article. I didn’t think he came off as depressed or bitter. I thought he sounded frustrated perhaps, but not depressed. He’s wise enough to realize that fame presents both amazing opportunities and giant, crushing barriers. The interview shows that he is contemplative, self-questioning, and can still maintain a sense of humor to cope with reality. Basically, he’s still the Rob we fell in love with, just becoming more cognizant of what he wants in life. He wouldn’t have all these questions if he didn’t want the answers — this is a sign he’s got intellectual curiosity and hope. If he didn’t have questions or didn’t want answers…that’s when I’d really worry about him & his mental state.

    But that’s my take on the written part of the article. In terms of photo aspect, it all seemed too staged. I think AL’s best photos are when she lets her subject have a bit more creative license/expression, and lets them “go” so to speak. The photos don’t really match the text, with what he’s trying to say, but then again, maybe they do (creatively restrained).

  38. Deb says:

    You people “SUCK”

  39. che says:

    it’s hard to compere with that shirtless 10pack Rob but i think this manip is good…also hope any nonstener dosen’t freak out
    http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/5273/tumblrlhfachaqtq1qdv921.jpg

  40. Mieze says:

    I´ve been thinking about that interview since yesterday…and forgive me, I haven´t read all of your comments, so I might repeat some of your opinions…

    But I have to say, I was waiting for something like that for some time now. With all the Robmania that is surrounding him and the fact that he isn´t able to be unrecognized anywhere he goes it was only a matter of time. I admire him… he kept his spirit up for so long…that`s not that easy if one of your close friends is already moaning over it again and again…just saying. And apart from all the public attention, he worked liked crazy for years now and no money, even if we are talking about Billions here, can buy you the feeling of being happy, confident and just your random self. I just hope he takes a break, giving himself some time to rest…burnout is a serious illness or like one of my professors always said: ” There is no such thing as burnout, this is just a word to make people accept their depressions easier…”. Sorry that I am so serious about that, but the interview made me really sad…

    • Mieze says:

      I just heard the Ryan Seacrest interview with Rob and I have to say I am kind of relieved. The boy sounds good :-) Doesn´t change my mind about him taking a break though ;-)

      • natteringyeahrobber says:

        Ack! I missed that. My stupid work speakers aren’t working (again). Just have access to a stupid summary from Gossip Cop…but I guess based on the lame ass summary on GC, he sounds cold, wet, and happy.

  41. maggie says:

    The interview is heartbreaking. I hope Rob can survive the circus that is his life at present and come out of it as a whole person, retaining the wonderful characteristics that have made him so unique and made so many of us fall in love with him.

    On a more pervy/humorous note: I’m at work and haven’t yet been able to read all the posts, so this may be redundant, but has anyone noticed the placing of the tagline “The World’s Best Restaurant” on the cover shot?

    Just sayin……….

    • maggie says:

      Wait a doggone minute. I have one picture where the tagline says “The World’s Best Restaurant” and another that says “The World’s Worst Best Restaurant”. What to make of this?? Is someone so overwhelmed by the hawtness that they turned into a blubbering idiot? Do they think that this particular dining establishment is the worst? the best? the worst best?

      ok, better cease and desist now. I’m just feeling a bit too pervy today. In need of a nap. Think I’ll go look for an alligator to snuggle with.

      • natteringyeahrobber says:

        The word “best” is on his crotch. Just take out all the other words and there you have it. Concentrate on” best”.

        Though if I was in charge of layout, I’d have to find a way to put “Master of the Universe” somewhere near his crotch (even if it was some story about a crazy dictator).

        • maggie says:

          Wouldn’t that be a hoot? Like a secret code for fans of Fifty. I bet it would even make Rob laugh – if, hopefully, he was in a happy mood.

          I just read that he’s supposed to be on Jay Leno on March 18th. Love his interviews with Jay. Hope Papa Pattinson will be there again.

          • natteringyeahrobber says:

            Oh, on Leno! Guess someone gave Summit AutoTune PR computer a manual override. YES. More live Rob, YES!

          • maggie says:

            LOL! Thank goodness SOMEONE over there at Scummit is normal and paying attention. Maybe there’s an LTR lady who’s infiltrated!

          • natteringyeahrobber says:

            maggie – you are in LA right? – any chance of you scoring tickets to leno? i’m sure they are up on craigslist for $990 now, so that’s probably a dumb question.

          • natteringyeahrobber says:

            p.s. it would be cool if you were there – you could go catatonic for all of us – :)

          • maggie says:

            nat: re Leno: I went on the website where you can order tickets. They tell you to put in the date you want and 3 alternate dates. 3/18, of course, wasn’t available, (duh) but I put it in anyway as all four date choices. You never know, right? If I should be in the audience, you’ll be able to recognize me. I’ll be the stone cold, catatonic statue holding a watermelon.

  42. natteringyeahrobber says:

    Top 10 Reasons Why, After Reading the VF article, I Love Rob
    (but won’t twitter his location even if I knew it, not that I ever really know it, and not just because I don’t have a twitter account).

    1. “I like crazy people who don’t give a fuck.” WIN!

    2. “It looks like spiders have written it.”

    3. Re Tai: “she was the best actor I’ve ever worked with in my life” (melts me every time I read it)

    4. “He watches a lot of stuff and can talk about movies very intelligently” (Francis Lawrence, on Rob). Rob, did I mention I worked in a movie theater for 5 years and in a video store (back when they existed) for 6, and pretty much watched everything in the collection. Let’s talk, Rob.

    5. “He’s allergic to pot” (LOL)

    6. Throws pretzel M&Ms in the toilet while reading David Foster Wallace. (not a totally uncommon reaction, actually)

    7. Loves Martin Amis (dude, I want to sit in your lap and have you read Amis to me before bedtime, sounds crazy, but “I don’t give a fuck.”)

    8. After tossing around references to Godard and Japanese films, he states that he feels like a “snobby little shit.” – there’s that self deprecating Rob you just have to adore

    9. “I don’t have a team” – snap! fuck off advertising people!

    10 “There, there you sleep” to Martin the dog. Another melty moment.

    • The Old One says:

      Thanks for plucking out the gems, there, Nat! I guess there were a few after all, what with all the sobbing and why-me-ing.

      • natteringyeahrobber says:

        No prob – I liked the article, though I wished the interviewer(s) was/were actually Moon and/or UC – Rob would not have needed candles and a fire to feel at ease with them. I cannot believe his assistants felt the need to put out scented candles and a roaring fire so Rob would feel comfortable with the VF reporter. That was the oddest part of the interview to me. Really? Anyhow, I just have a feeling if it was Moon/UC, candles & fire tricks would not have been necessary.

        Oh and:

        Dear Rob:

        I AM CRAZY (about you) AND DONT GIVE A FUCK!!!!!Or F’ing Crazy about YOU! LIKE ALLCAPS CRAZY! NO FUCK!

        Feel free to write in your spider language – just maybe bring in A Garf to translate,

        Love,
        Me

  43. Tiffany says:

    i can hear the clickity click click of fan fiction writers everywhere who suddenly have a billion ideas because of this photoshoot.

  44. nocoolname says:

    Oh LADIES!!!! Haven’t laughed this hard at an LTT/LTR post in a while!!! Hilarious, and TRULY, someone should show this to Rob because it is ALL SORTS of funny and would make him want to be your best friend. I am so not kidding. I kind of don’t care about the photoshoot/interview itself (I know, blasphemy on LTR) but this post is SO MUCH WIN.

  45. omg it’s been nutty today! so happy to jump in here for a moment!!!

  46. Nelle says:

    But the interviewer got this right: “His face has a kind of gorgeousness one sees in the faces of children, with its perfect pale skin, red lips, large eyes. It’s hard to say it any other way: he’s beautiful.” But not the “tuck” Moon. How could you?

  47. sarah says:

    ladies, i’ve got to say, i enjoy your articles and i love you a lot but you get no love from me for making fun of louisiana. not cool. it isn’t “how they do it down in new orleans”

  48. RobsFan-tasy says:

    I climbed on my soap box and preached about all this over at RAoR yesterday so I’ll spare you of going through all that again. I’ll just say that something needs to be done to stop the crazy fans and paps from invading peoples personal space. It should be considered stalking and they need to make a law against it. The article broke my heart and made me feel so bad for Rob.
    As for the photos, I don’t get all the complaints. Everyone says he’s an old soul, old world Romantic and all this but then when he agrees to do a photo shoot portraying this side of him everyone has a cow. The photo with the gator maybe they just did that cause they were in BR either way, whatever the reason, I think its HOT! I’ve seen far worse photos of Rob and loved them anyway.
    *shrugs* to each his/her own I guess.

    • maggie says:

      I totes agree with you gf. Ever since that despicable Malibu car chase, I’ve thought that the paps really need to be muzzled. There have been a few changes in the law here in California since then, but not enough, if you ask me.

      I’m loving the VF pics. At first glance, I wasn’t too enthralled, but as I’ve studied them (and my oh my, have I been a good student today), they seem to grow hotter by the minute. My fav at the moment is the piano pic. Mmmm, Mmm, Mmm. I saw a cleaned up version of the one in the car, and that one is getting me hotter by the minute. That slouch…..yum, yum. I’m tellin’ ya – an alligator, a fedora…it doesn’t matter. Dress that boy up in a coonskin hat and highwater clown pants, and he’d still make me weak at the knees.

      I hope everyone is surfing their Robsites of choice today. There seems to be new WFE stills coming out everytime I log on. I’m getting so antsy for that movie to open. Is it April yet???

      • RobsFan-tasy says:

        Totes thanks BB! I’m seriously thinking about seeing how you go about getting a petition together to write that “Light Of Day Law”. Totes flying blind on the subject of how you go about getting laws written but it’s just not right what they do to celebs. and it’s got to stop!

      • JustGoWithIt says:

        Coonskin hat and highwater clown pants! Thanks for the giggle. Next we’ll be hearing he is up for the role of Wolverine in a new comic adaption. Is there a special term for side burn wigs?

      • ladyofthemeadow says:

        That car photo makes me think about car sex. With Rob: hawt. Teenage memories of car sex: not as comfortable and inviting as Rob is making it look.

  49. Unlikelyfangirl says:

    Rob waiting for his Kosher pickle…Claire teaching the “look, smolder, dazzle.” THIS is what makes Breaking it Down Vanity Fair style the art form it truly is. Thanks for the fit of hysterical laughter this post inspired. I needed it today.

  50. JustGoWithIt says:

    Awe, that looked like good chat & I came to the party late. Lainey’s breakdown of the photo was funny, always good for a not quite fangirl view of things. I hadn’t really thought about being a man of Twilight fame, and trying to appeal to a male audience, or just not have males want to beat you up in bars. But don’t worry Rob, men in bars are like that to normal guys too. When my husband (them boyfriend) and I were younger and went out to bars, dudes would get scrappy with my husband just because dudes get scrappy. I don’t think he’ll have to prove he is able to play a convincing Wolverine (okay I would LOVE to see that) to have a good movie career, just act well.
    Honestly though it would be a weird existence, but he probably could coast the rest of his career with Twilight fangirl admirers only. There are enough of them. Or he could always take his millions and run! Ain’t no shame. How much would I like to have retired at 25 and just traveled, made art and take lots of dance lessons, raise my family. Sounds freaking sweet to me. I swear I would not have been angsty about it.

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