Summit doesn’t “Get” Rob Pattinson’s Attraction

Dear Rob,

I’m gonna go out on a limb here & say that I don’t think Summit understands how hot you are. Sure they “get it” a little bit. They didn’t fire you after the first movie when they had more money to hire a bigger “star.” They understood that you as Edward was a big part of Twilight’s success (and also Buttcrack Santa, may he rest in peace), but it’s become clear to me that they don’t really understand the extent of your good-looks and our attraction to you. Or, at least, they don’t know what to do with it.

Yes, I’m talking about how they turned Edward the hot 17 year old from Twilight (the one success of Cathy Hardi) into a tweed-wearing Grandpa with who constantly sucks on werthers candy in New Moon:

And then in Eclipse they apparently tried to appeal to the German fans & turned you into a David Hasselhoff-clone

And then they did what we all feared when we first read that Bella got knocked-up.. Turned Edward into a “Dad.” I don’t know what job he has specifically, but it’s definitely something in sales.

Is it real estate?

How about used cars?

I’m afraid there’s gonna be a scene in Rio where Edward runs into the Tommy Bahama outlet to pick up a few Palm Tree golf shirts.

Do I need to remind Summit of your attraction, Rob, and give them some ideas for how Edward COULD have looked?

Sad-ward for when he leaves Bella in New Moon:

 

Bad-ass-ward for when Edward isn’t ABOUT to lose Bella to Jacob in Eclipse:

And then Nesting-ward for when Edward finally gets to lose his v-card, father a cute kid & just “hang out and stuff” or whatever they plan to do for the rest of eternity:

 

THAT’s the Edward I read when I first read the Twilight books. Summit is gonna get me into the theater either way, but I might just go a couple more times if Edward looks like the Edward of my dreams… (so… you in all your photo-shoots. Sorry- it’s your life now)

XO,

UnintendedChoice

What do you think? Are you as unimpressed as I am with these Edward-in-Breaking-Dawn photos? I’m SERIOUSLY getting a “Salesman” vibe from them….

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72 Responses to “Summit doesn’t “Get” Rob Pattinson’s Attraction”

  1. drsaka says:

    I can’t wait to make fun of the clothes, hair, makeup, wigs, jewelery- all the ‘styling’ in BD1&2- this should be great.

    Rob still looks attractive, regardless!

  2. guitargirl says:

    LMAO! I agree! Bloody Summit manages to turn the hottest guy in the planet into Averageward. I think that is some achievement! Where the hell is Edwards smile in these latest pics? Why is he still looking pissy, even though he’s married the girl of his dreams, has lost (or is abut to lose) his V card, and his wife has agreed to become immortal for him? The Edward in my head wore nice clothes (not effing Tweed) that were a little dishevelled from Bella always trying to hump him. I think that Summit completely missed the point of the entire Twi Saga. I much prefer the pics you ladies posted. I really think Summit should have hired you to head their wardrobe department!

  3. GMB says:

    l’ve actually been disappointed in the way they have made Rob look in the last 2 movies and the trailer for BD part 1 isnt inspiring much hope that this one will be any better. I dont know it they are trying to hard or not trying hard enough.

  4. ladyofthemeadow says:

    I really like hot dad packing for vacation, even if I’d be tempted to rip the cigarette out of his mouth and throw it away.

    I’m going to be a contrarian and say I kind of like CEO Domward (the one talking about crown mouldings). In my mind, he’s my hot boss who’s about to deliver a backhanded compliment on an extensive report I did for him.

    • natteringyeahrobber says:

      For the past few months, I’ve been invited (forced) to sit through these torturously long meetings with vendors, who are all trying to get our business. They (the vendors) call us and tell us 2 people will show up to present, but in reality it is always 3 people. 2 people + some “secret weapon” guy (always male) from their headquarters. 9 times out of 10 the secret weapon is reasonably attractive and the sole purpose seems to be to influence female decision making via sheer hotness. OF COURSE, it doesn’t work. On me. I prefer back-street bribery, thanks, I’m over 35 and know better. And need the money, summer camp isn’t cheap.

      HOWEVER, should SecretWeaponWard show up to the next presentation, there’s no telling what I might purchase. I’d sign up for the most expensive plan possible. I’d buy duplicates, triplicates, clear out their stock and bankrupt my company.

      • ladyofthemeadow says:

        I had to read your post twice. I thought I saw, “OF COURSE it works”, because that’s where my brain went first.

        Having charming, insanely attractive men grovel at my feet for my attention and money is a rare but highly enjoyable aspect of my job. I never let them win on the basis of their looks and charm, but it does make the process a whole lot more entertaining. Of course, I have to play the married card, but maybe that just makes it safe AND entertaining.

        From now on I will silently call them “SecretWeaponWard”.

        If the real thing (Rob) showed up, all bets would be off. Rip off that solitaire and anniversary band. Then the clothes. In my alternate universe.

        • maggie says:

          I’m starting to feel like RL is my alternate universe. Rob is (or should be) my reality.

          Totally normal, I think…..

  5. Yes!!! Those would have been MUCH better!! Edward eating corn in his cable knit sweater…oops, they don’t eat. Well, that sweater is all kinds of win somehow. Or how about this if they wanted to go all Grandpa:

    http://rpattzsa.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/055.jpg?w=490&h=732

    He could cook me eggs anytime!!

  6. miapattinson says:

    omg i agree!! robert never looked as great as he looked in Twilight, i dont know who did his make up, hair and eyebrows in Newmoon and Eclipse. Thats what I missed the most! sigh im always wishing that it was still catherine hardwick is the director of the rest of saga. Shes a woman and she knows the elements needed for us to swoon and feel the movie. Gone is the love and romance.ANyway, I like him best in his casual, live interview, real etc.. I love him and he is the MOST BEAUTIFUL Man alive. Anwyay, who cares..i love whatever film rob is..i support him all the way

  7. dazzledtodeath says:

    Summit had to mess with perfection. They have an actor with the unearthly beauty called for in the books, and they had to go and take it down a few notches-the only logical reason is that Summit thought there’d be no way anyone would believe someone who looked like that would fall for someone like..oh, nevermind. Twilight Edward was the best, and the closest to book Edward. Don’t even get me started on the complete lack of continuity from film to film.

    But they don’t only do it with Rob-the entire BD calendar is a disaster, especially Carlisle. What did Peter do to piss off the wig people?

    • purplescool says:

      I agree – they make every character look different from film to film. Poor Jackson Rathbone – I swear his wig gets more “Little Lord Fauntleroy” in every movie. And could they please make Ashley Greene’s wig look more like actual hair and less like that hairy felt that I use for my kids’ school art projects? I don’t dare to hope for anything for Rob – I fear he’ll look like always – as if he’s trying to solve a really complicated math puzzle in his head, but can’t quite get it.

  8. KeepOnKeepingOn says:

    Exactly… it’s like they’re trying to make Edward look like a stiff old fart. Um, hello. The man is hot. Dress him as such. Thank you.

  9. KeepOnKeepingOn says:

    D2D, love the Peter comment! I truly don’t get Summit’s logic. Why the hell do they change everyone up from film to film? I’m sure it has to do with the changing of directors from film to film. Maybe they are embracing Obama’s campaign slogan? If so, it’s working out about as well. Lots of money spent on “change” with nothing productive coming from it! Ok, I know I’ll get some thumbs down for that, but I don’t care. I’m just having fun. If it were McCain in office, I’d joke about him, too. Just call me Dave or Jay! My show can be “Late Night with Koko!”.

  10. drsaka says:

    Not that I was going to use them, but have the thumbs up/down disappeared for anyone else?

  11. Kaybvee says:

    Edward’s hair is too dark and too short. Am hoping the calendar is WAY off base overall though, especially Carlisle, whoa.

  12. Rob's slow mo' strut says:

    Loved that you used all those VF shots! They were his best pictures to date, as far as I’m concerned. The pinkness of his lips in the one where he’s in a blue jacket? Yum. The arched eyebrows in the one where he’s in a white shirt? So sexy!

    Thanks for the laugh with all the captions :) I needed that.

  13. 3hboyshouse says:

    Yes! You are right on UC! I already have a salesman/engineer/dockers wearing hubby here at home! I need a hot Rob for my fantasy.

    Hot Rob packing up the car for vacation is my new all time fav now! I needed that to help get through this long a** summer! Thanks!

  14. Kaybvee says:

    And during said DAY LONG secret weapon-ward meeting, you would hire me as your assistant to take copious notes and photos of the meeting (for security purposes if course).

    A night on the town to sweeten the deal would top it off nicely. Just call me when you are done. We have already established that I’m not above sloppy seconds, where the boy is concerned.

  15. maggie says:

    As far as I’m concerned, Scummit doesn’t get Twilight, Rob or the fans of either of the above. I don’t care about wolves and action and vampires killing people. When it comes to Twilightk, I care about Edward. Scummit’s Edward is not my Edward. The BD calendar sucks.

    Rob, however, IS my Edward. And, for the record, I would buy anything, anytime, anywhere for any price from Rob or Robward. Especially if the price included sexual favors.

  16. True Cullen Spirit says:

    Someone had too much fun with photoshop. Poor Peter I saw that pic and was wondering who the heck he pissed off in all the departments. And Jackson went from muppet to so who is that new guy? Actually the one that is most improved is Nikki, she must have made besties with some influential people. And then theirs Ashley she looks like they stuck a Monchichi headpiece on her. Rob may look too stern but at least he doesn’t look horrendous, just middle aged.

  17. Mieze says:

    I guess that simply nails it: Summit is gonna get me into the theater either way…
    They just don’t need to put any effort in it as long as Rob is gonna be in one of their movies. They could paint him black and glue feathers onto his body, I would still pay to watch him ;-)

  18. enviro says:

    Great post! Headboard aside, I am unimpressed with the BD shots so far. I thought he looked like a putz at the end of the aisle in the trailer as well. Quit overstyling him people! What’s the use. We’ll go anyway, and frankly they may have taken the overstyling to a whole ‘nother level in the Cosmopolis extravaganza. So maybe it’s irresistible, taming the hair and the sexiness? Is that why I am finding myself craving Tyler? We need a movie where he plays a rock star so he can be suitably disheveled.

  19. ladyofthemeadow says:

    “Are those Werther’s in your pants, or are you happy to see me?”

  20. Jessica says:

    They need to make a Rob calendar with just those VF pics in them! Yummy, yummy!

  21. Pam says:

    The only one that got his look right was Catherine Hardwicke in the first Twilight movie. It wasn’t perfect, the lipstick was ridiculous, but at least his hair was long (which is an attractive style on him) and it was the right color, and he looked GOOD. I don’t think the filmmakers can get a grasp on the idea that women like looking at a good-looking young man, and that our idea of good-looking is not necessarily what THEY think it is. Yes, women are difficult to understand. We like different things at different times, our moods seeming to change with the day, or even the hour. But I believe we made our preferences about Edward known loud and clear, through the sales of the book, through the reaction to the first movie, and through our whole-hearted approval of Rob when he still embodied the Edward-look, back in 2008. I wish they had left well enough alone. I wish that he had never decided to cut his hair and change his look so completely. And most of all, I wish they had gotten another woman to direct the movies or ANYBODY who understands what Edward means to the Twilight fans.

  22. che says:

    LOL when i saw BD Edward pics all i thougth was
    http://letterstorob.com/tag/cruise/
    i wonder if this is gonna be like that anymore.
    do we lost Rob and instead have Bob?
    cuz i don’t like Bob who is a dad,have a wife and joins to cruise trips and to me is a total soap-opera type.
    he might be a sales man but he looked like a doctor to me a doctor on general hospital :)).
    give us back our 17 years old hot wampire summit
    p.s. Eclipse Edward was the worse!!!!!

  23. Kaybvee says:

    Just saw some new BD photos/montages *gulp* he looks amazing…maybe because his hair is all sexy times Isle Esme’d out…but as a lot of the twis in twitter say, and as it seems to be appropriate right now…

    F*ckhawt!

  24. alice_av says:

    The Edward in my head is like the first movie, he exactly just like the books except for that damn lipstick. Were is the hair in these pictures??? I mean as many of you, I will go either way to the movie, but they really screwed up and entire franchise because they are such a greedy bast—rds sorry can not hold back that one.

  25. Kaybvee says:

    If you don’t already, then Like “Robert Pattinson Fans” on FB. She has two BD albums, the yummy one I saw today is called ??

    She’s on twitter too but her name is different, if you want that, let me know…

    • Um yeah, I could get into it. BDward is so much better without clothes!!!!!
      And on a totally other subject (not really, but it’s a weird segway) the little fam pic looks cute!

  26. Gia says:

    I could NOT agree with this post more! That said, knowing that Rob’s hair was shorter due to WFE, etc I think we are darn lucky Summit didn’t take it upon themselves to send Edward to the Summit Wig Department to re-create the look. Heaven forbid.

  27. Katycougar says:

    UC once again you call them out…………….

    He is looking to dad-like for me.

    The guy is a hot 17 year old vampire (okay maybe he is over a 100, but we are talking about his body here). Because of this he appears rather boring. I don’t find Rob boring, but Summit has made Edward out to be just that.

    A fine example is this. Rob said it was a real horror movie and so it is.

    http://www.imdb.com/media/rm872331520/nm1500155

    This alone would send me packing, waterfall or not. Playing chess on the honeymoon, more than once? On my honeymoon we were trying to figure out how many places we could do it and I am not talking about chess, but that is just what these two appear to be doing. Let me see: on the beach, in the sunroom………… Do you know what I am saying here? I am thinking they have their head down south.

    Give me more of this……………..

    http://www.imdb.com/media/rm236292352/ch0210076

    I know plenty of “Hot” Dad’s out there. This did not have to happen.

    • We’ve discussed the playing chess here before (it’s not in the book). But we do have to remember he was trying to keep her away from the bedroom so he wouldn’t kill her. Although, he was supposed to be tiring her out with all the swimming with the dolphins type activities. Not the distracting her while playing chess. Cause if I was staring at that man (yes, even wearing those clothes and playing chess) it would NOT distract me from taking him to the bedroom!!!

      • Katycougar says:

        Yes you are right. So we agree that chess would not tire her out. I want to see the action here. (These were in the book.)

        The distractions we will miss:
        The snorkeling
        Jungle exploration
        Visiting Parrots
        Gazing at Sunset
        Swim with Porpoises

        Coral Reefs, Hidden Caves and sea Turtles.

        The choices are endless.

  28. Kaybvee says:

    The fam pic is surprisingly cute. The waterfall stuff? Yummo. And yeah, he should just be nakey and bathed in Isle Esme house golden light the whole movie…yep…

    And don’t get me STARTED on the black and white striped sweater. From New Moon strut to that-um, no.

    • maggie` says:

      Mmm. Mmm. The New Moon Slo-Mo Strut: hips swinging, shy smile, tons of hair, sexy oufit. Gorgeous, hot Robward……. Now THAT’S what I’m talkin’ about.

      • natteringyeahrobber says:

        Agreed. I like Stalkward like everyone else (especially if it means late night visitations to my room), but the Slo-Mo Ray-Ban strut is undeniably delicious. I dream of Slo-Mo Rob walking towards me when I am waiting at the bus stop every morning (which might explain why everyone sort of backs away from me…I’m probably drooling and mumbling something about Rob).

    • Yep, I’m in denial about the striped sweater…never saw it ;) But I think that’s how we’re all gonna be during this movie. Forget the eye patches to block out ones we don’t want to see, we’ll need some Obliviate to wipe our memories clean!

      • maggie` says:

        rfm: Which striped sweater are we talking about? (since my $%#@*$ computer at work isn’t letting me open many attachments -grrr).

        • It’s on FB, I’ll message it to you! But really it’s much better to think about the SloMo Strut or the Everyone’s Staring at Us Smirk. Believe me!

          • ladyofthemeadow says:

            It always drove me nuts that Bella/KStew didn’t look all that happy when Edward/Rob was doing his Everyone’s Staring at Us look and walk (if I was in her shoes, my smile would be as wide as the parking lot). How art mirrors RL…

      • ladyofthemeadow says:

        “Obliviate”, haha, I love it. Nice use of genre-crossing. If that is a word.

    • My other thought is this:

      He must of got some serious waxing done for this film!!!

      • ladyofthemeadow says:

        I bet he cried like a baby and they had to bring out the Nair and it was a big secret on the set among the makeup people.

        I don’t cry getting waxed. Not at all. Then again I don’t get my chest waxed. Maybe chest hurts more than a brazilian? Nah, it can’t. Whatev, you get my drift.

  29. KeepOnKeepingOn says:

    Hell to effin’ yeah on the slo-mo strut! can’t remember the name, but th song playing in the background is by far my favorite on the soundtrack due to the nice visual it brings forth.#

    • maggie` says:

      The song is “Monster” by Hurricane Bells. And I know exactly what you mean….

      • ladyofthemeadow says:

        I listened to this song on my walk to work. It has a nice pace for warming up to a brisk walk!

        • maggie` says:

          Did you start off with a slo-mo strut in honor of Robward? :)

          • ladyofthemeadow says:

            Good idea for tomorrow morning’s walk. I’m sure it would give a special thrill to the construction workers down my street. Special thrill = who’s that weird woman and why is is walking like that? They don’t look like the Robsessed type, but you never know…

  30. KeepOnKeepingOn says:

    Great minds think alike, RFM. I love that stare, too…

  31. KeepOnKeepingOn says:

    I meant that smirk. His hair, the jacket, the shades… damn, he looks good!

  32. kstwilighter says:

    I am so glad to hear this! I thought I was the only one that was sorely disappointed in the appearance of almost everyone in the last 2 movies. Where did SUMMIT find these people to do: hair(bad wigs), clothing(In the books Alice was a diva of fashion, she looks like she bought her clothes 2 sizes too big and from Goodwiil). I’m not only talking about the women of Twilight, but what happened to Jaspers hair-UGH! Poor Rob, if he looks like that (BD calendar) throughout the whole last 2 BD movies, bad judgement on Summits part. At least Charlie (Billy Burke) looked the same! I hope people at SUMMIT read this stuff!!!!!

  33. Maria says:

    Im 100% with you on this. Summit have not s clue of what to do with the hotness, their pr-pics are a joke. And robs wasnt even the worse! Bella/kristens is indescribable

  34. Dolly Reader says:

    Thanks for including the “pack the car” Dad shot. I have to say it’s one of my favs ever! Funny, funny post!

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