Rob is a rumored Oscar contender and Grammy nominee, Daytime Emmy and Nobel Peace Prize contender. Right.

Oh hey, just me, future Oscar nominee

Dear Rob,

Today I clicked on a tweet promising me set pictures from Water for Elephants and I was greeted with picture of you in a tux and clip on bowtie (tsk tsk) but I was also greeted with an opening line of “Rumored Oscar contender Robert Pattinson…” UM wait a second?! HOLD THE PHONE. Rumored Oscar contender? Did I miss something here. Were you in a movie that was worthy of Oscar buzz? I’m pretty sure the Academy will laugh in the face of anything Twilight because so-called real movie critics love to hate on it. And well we all know Remember Me had it’s moments of not so greatness. And then there’s Harry Potter, but I’m pretty sure the Oscars are given out on a yearly basis and as awesome as ruddy-cheeked Cedric Diggory is, there’s NO way you’d be nominated for that. SO my only assumption can be that this is a rumor about Water for Elephants.

Yes, the Water for Elephants that is CURRENTLY still in production. Who knew about a month into filming that you could already be getting buzz for award season TWO years from now, because if Water for Elephants comes out in 2011 that means it won’t be eligible till 2012! So you can see why I’m quite surprised. This got me to thinking… what else could you be rumored to be nominated for in the future that we don’t know about yet…

  • Robert Pattinson rumored Grammy Award nominee for his rap album “Bros before Hoes” with the chart topping singles “Drivin’ Dirty,” “Some call it Bitchface, I just call you a bitch,” “Drop it like a Hot Pocket,” and collaborations with NAS and a posthumous duet with Biggie Smalls “It’s all about (Summit’s) Benjamin’s.”

Beauty school drop out, missed your midterms and flunked Shampoo

  • Robert Pattinson rumored Tony Award nominee for hisr role as Teen Angel in the Grease Revival on Broadway in 2025 after your career wanes, your bald spot can’t be covered up you get kicked off the judges panel on American Idol and your Grammy Award winning music career tanks.
  • Robert Pattinson rumored 2040 Daytime Emmy Award nominee for his role on Days of Our Lives as Jake Storm the new guy in town with a checkered past who comes into Salem and sweeps Sammy off her feet against Roman and Marlena’s pleas for Sammy to be careful. She has the kids to think of now after all. Will Beau and Hope be able to escape the blizzard and make it to the shot gun wedding in time to warn Sammy about Jake? Or will the dastardly Stefano finally ruin the Horton’s good name forever?
  • Robert Pattinson rumored Pulitzer Prize winner 2015 for his investigative journalism into the sweat shops behind the Hot Topic and NECA retailers that produce Twilight merchandise. A tribute is paid to an especially moving portion of the piece introduces us to Johnny, a 9 year old boy who is tasked with putting the pea coats on Edward Cullen action figures.
  • Robert Pattinson rumored Nobel Peace Prize winner of 2012 for his work in helping bring peace between Team Edward and Team Jacob and Robsten and Nonsten. Your work at the negotiation table between the opposing sides was awe-inspiring, vindicating and impressive. Not many people would mediate talks between these camps without a flack jacket on.

So it looks like you’ve got a full career ahead of you, if these rumors are true. My only hope is that someday you win “Best of Show” at the Westminster Dog Show for your award winning English Bulldogs that you and TomStu breed on your country farm.

Rumored Best Blogger Ever (in her own mind) nominee,
Themoonisdown

Does it seem a bit soon to be calling Rob’s turn as Jacob Jankowski in Water for Elephants a contender for the Oscars? What about the Tony’s or the Nobel Peace Prize? What else should Rob be nominated for?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

95 Commented


My Confession: Rob finally becomes Edward Cullen in Eclipse

*SPOILER ALERT! As if you would expect anything different after we’ve just seen Eclipse for the first time!*

Oh heeeeeey there Edward Cullen!

Dear Rob,

I have a confession to make: I’ve never truly thought of you as Edward Cullen. I know, right? A year and a half later and I’m just telling you this? Hear me out…  I’ve always thought of Edward Cullen from the books as a different person than the Edward Cullen you play in the films. Sure, they have the same name and share some of the same lines but there’s something about the book version and your portrayal that were just not the same to me. I can’t completely pinpoint why that is, it just is.

But tonight I think you got it. Or at least the beginnings of whatever IT is. While watching Eclipse for the first time there were moments when I watched you and I thought, wow he’s Edward Cullen right now, not just Rob playing Edward Cullen.

We should really protect your virtue, and this gold brocade bedding from any accidents

Like when Edward and Bella had the modernity talk on that blasted gold brocade bedspread about not wanting to have sex before marriage. It wasn’t that he didn’t love her and want to do such things it just went against his nature and how he was brought up and what time period his values and morals came from. I’m pretty sure I swooned hard with the talk about chaperoned walks and stolen kisses. Hey, I’m an Austen-Regency-era lover, I can’t help it.  And I even tried to block the image of Joshua Harris Kissing Dating Goodbye when you mentioned courting, but there was something just SO Edward Cullen about it all. A little bit old fashioned, a little bit shy, a little bit sweet and a whole lot of Edward all wrapped into one on that awful bedspread.

LET'S DO THIS!

Though there were many times your dialogue felt stilted and awkward, thought most of the time (and we’ll talk about this later) that awkwardness and stunted dialogue was between you and Kristin, you really did shine this time around. Even when your portrayal of him felt very outside of the book-Edward we know, for instance like when you got angry and shook Jacob or when you let Bella ride off with Jacob on the bike, though what was WAY outside of book-Edwards boundaries and character, it still felt like it could have been a possibility. And maybe you tapped into something that book-Edward was needing all along. A little more danger? A little more emotion? I don’t know but I was feeling it. Your whole performance and the movie as a whole was way more refined, way more drilled down than the previous films, less neon bug eyes and more soft around the edges.

Just thinking about "courting"

I’ve always wondered if Stephenie Meyer felt the same way about seeing actors portray characters she’d had in her mind long before any actor ever brought them to life on celluloid. Did you guys live up to those characters in her mind or are they two separate things. Maybe I’ll just have to call up our new BFF and pretend to be JK Rowling with a lost alternate ending to Harry Potter so she’ll take my call and see if she agrees with me.

But for tonight as we close in on 4am I’ll just say good job. Now to figure out when I can see the movie again and who I can send a letter to to ask the caterer to slip a Valium in yours and Kristen’s lunch of coffee and cigarettes before you film any scenes together in Breaking Dawn with dialogue. Help us.

Team Edward!
Themoonisdown

PS But seriously, Edward in the snowy mountain scene? You looked 3D or animated or CGI-ed into a snow globe (Snow Globeward?). We HAVE to talk about that some day.

SOOOO what’d you think? Have you seen IT yet?! Have you always pictures Rob at Edward Cullen or am I alone in this one?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

129 Commented


The Rob Pattinson Theme Park

Rob- I was up till 3 am making the new LTR pretty Sunday night and out late last night with Papa Choice celebrating my birthday on a boat (that didn’t move) so Cath and drsaka saved the day with a letter to you!

Dear Rob,

We’ve noted that there is now a Harry Potter Theme Park.

Of course, we‘re hoping that a significant portion of the park is devoted to your excellent, rosy cheeked English school boy character, Cedric Diggory, and his ‘wand’. We plan to visit soon to explore this possibility! However, this gave us this idea and hope: A Twi-theme Park! We’re very excited by this idea: imagine, being able to have a full sensory Twi-experience! It’s the realization of our acute, fond hopes.

So for our wish that this concept will be realized, we have suggestions for this park. The park will be comprised of different areas devoted to aspects of the Twilight Saga, and naturally Edward will have a big role in the park.

In the interest of full commitment to the dream, we have commissioned a team of artists and craftsmen to design and produce animatronics or robots of the beloved Twilight characters, especially Edward. We will spare no expense to avoid the animatronics looking like this:

or like this:

We hope that your Twi-theme Park experience will give you a Cullen smile!

Interactive Twi-Rides and Experiences:

Our interactive rides are designed to give you a unique Twilight experience. Rides that we offer are:

The Spidermonkey: Racing up and down trees on the back of a robot Edward.

Haunted Volterra: Travel underground through scary passages under Volterra while interacting with beloved members of the Volturi.

Volterra Labyrinth: Experience Bella’s heart-pounding two-minute journey to save Edward by finding your way through our replica of the city of Volterra in a yellow Porsche. You will arrive in the square just in time to save Edward (available every hour on the hour- reserve your experience now!).

St. Marcus Day Festival: Experience the exuberant atmosphere of our St. Marcus Day celebration. Red cloaks available for all.

Cullen Bumpercars: Have fun with your friends on the bumpercars (little silver Volvos, red Chevy trucks, red BMWs, and yellow Porsches).

Rollercoaster at Vampire Speed: Experience the thrills of traveling at the speed of vampires on our rollercoaster in cars each with a replica of our beloved vampires!

Forks Prom: Dance with Animatronic Edward at the Forks high School Prom! Huge number of twinkle lights extra.

We are proud to announce our three exclusive Wii™ Twilight Experiences!

Vampire Baseball: Engage in the American past-time with our exclusive Wii™ Twi-vampire baseball game! Be Team Edward!!!

La Push Surf: Surf with the gang at La Push Beach in another Wii™ experience. Surfer-stoner van and licorice extra.

Wolf Pack: Run with the wolves through the Quileute Reservation in another exclusive Wii™experience. Special feature: you will be able to hear the pack thoughts!

Sparkling in the Meadow: Relax in the meadow with animatronic sparkly Edward! Odd, wonky leg positions are included.

Imprint Inc.: Experience to thrill of being imprinted on by a random stranger (stranger will accompany you throughout the park closely for the rest of your visit and possibly for the rest of your life.

Leghitch:

This will be our most popular attraction! Experience the legendary leghitch with an animatronic Edward. Alert: the animatronic Edward attraction is often unavailable due to repairs; call ahead to avoid disappointment. Due to unfortunate occurrences  during the testing phase of this attraction, real actors portraying Edward will no longer be available due to liability issues and pending legal action.

Concessions:

A replica of the Forks diner will be available for your dining enjoyment of steak and cobbler. Also on the menu are garden burgers, Italiano, including mushroom ravioli, spinach salads and edible art. Specials will include chicken and biscuits, Nando’s chicken, In-and-Out burgers, meat filled Hot Pockets, microwaved carrots and HobNobs. We offer one beverage, Heineken. For purchase, miniature replicas of chocolatehead Edward will be available

Shopping:

We are pleased to offer a one-stop center called ‘Shopping with Alice’. Personal shoppers portraying Alice Cullen, will assist each and every patron until they drop from shopping. Pea coats, giant mittens, prom dresses and tuxedoes are available. We specialize in tweed couture.

For party and wedding preparations, we offer each client a Personal Alice to plan single every aspect of your event. without consulting you. Twinkle light in trees available. Bows are extra.

LTT/LTR Shop: Thanks to UC and Moon, we are proud to offer exclusive merchandise from the LTT/LTR store. Do not pass up this opportunity to own these wonderful items inspired by the contributors of the LTT/LTR fandom!!!!

Coming in 2012! Fan Fiction Bookstore. Come in and peruse the myriad of Twi-FanFiction choices! Available for purchase is the highly anticipated BI Coffee Table book! Purchase CDs from the Park in-house band, The Weeping Ovaries! Adult only section of the store closed to those under 18 years old. There will be FF reading by the authors: medical personnel will be available to revive patrons.

Additional attractions will be added in the future. One such attraction will be:

Three to a Tent: Spend a night in nature in a tent with two actors portraying Edward and Jacob as the fight over you and you freeze. You will  be provided with a sleeping bag with heating pads to stimulate a ‘Night with Jacob’ while listening to the actors recreate the “Truce until Morning Scene’. An experience not to be missed!

Dear Rob, these are our suggestions for the assured-to-be-wildly successful Twi-theme Park! We look forward to visiting and experiencing these attractions for ourselves! We hope that you’ll be available to visit the park at the grand opening!

Sincerely,
Cath and drsaka

So LTR women, what attractions would you like to experience at the park??? What other Edward rides should there be?? Tell us your suggestions!

Ugh, girls? Isn’t it obvious? We just want a simple  Edward ride 🙂

Business Time:

Don’t forget that to celebrate the BRAND NEW LTR we are giving away a tshirt from our LTT_LTR Store! All you have to do is comment- we’ll randomly pick from amongst all the comments this week! The more you comment, the better chance you have of winning!

Thanks so much for all the great feedback for the new LTR and LTT look. It’s been a long process and managing a site this size is a big task  (unless you want to pay someone which we can’t afford!) We know there are some weird kinks & stuff. If you’re having trouble SEEING the new sites, clear your cookies & your cache. That should fix it. We’ll be adjusting things as they come up, so if there’s something you think we’re not aware of, please email us! Moving to this new site design allows us a LOT of freedom to roll out some cool features, so we’re excited to do that soon! XOXO

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

Thanks to Robsessed for those awful pics of Rob

212 Commented


Stuff my husband says about Rob

Introducing our new series: “Stuff my husband says about Rob.” Mostly because, well, they just don’t get it, do they?

Dear Rob,

After explaining my very hilarious post about Rob and Sam Bradley to him, Mr. Choice (who is my husband, of course) asked who Sam was. I answered “Rob’s best friend.” He responded:

I thought Krum was his best friend?

OMG. I momentarily forget my obsessi, er love for you and laughed so hard at his cute, sweet face.

rob-and-krum-bffsIn his defense, we had just watched The Goblet of Fire so it wasn’t so random that he made that connection!

He wants me to specify that I found this picture online and did not create it myself.  I think he’s worried that I come across as too obsessed with you (shh, it’s our secret just how deep my love runs. What’s that? Oh yes, how deep OUR love runs, sorry sweetie)

Love,
me (UnintendedChoice) xo

What funny things have your husbands/boyfriends/lesbian lovers had to say about Rob? (by the way, I don’t know if we have a lesbian Rob fan yet.. so if you’d like to be our first…) Comment below or e-mail us and maybe you’ll be featured in a future post! 

51 Commented


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