Rob really was found this time. And some dude wore suspenders

Unless you live in a silver Volvo parked deep in the woods of Forks, WA, we guess you’ve seen or heard that Rob was spotted twice this past weekend. We received letters from Mrs. P and thefutureMrs.P on the same day about this latest piece of news. That seemed like a coincidence, so we decided to throw the letters up here for your enjoyment. Xo

Invite says cocktail attair? Rob says "F that, I'm wearing a blue shirt with a black coat, my Nike kicks and a beanie. Suck it Vogue."

Invite says cocktail attire? Rob says “F that, I’m wearing a blue shirt with a black coat, my Nike kicks & a beanie. Suck it Vogue.”

Dear Rob,
So glad that you’ve finally made it out of hiding.  I can’t believe how long it’s been (actually it’s been 6weeks  5days  12hours and 15minutes if you want to be precise).  I’ve gotta say, you had me scared.  There have been so many rumors swirling around about you being with some skank pretty brunette or of being in Brazil, or Mexico, New York or Vancouver. I can’t keep up with all the craziness!! It’s so good to be able to finally put all the rumors to rest (except for the brunette…come on you can tell me…I can keep a secret…).

I’m happy knowing that you are still at home resting up, relaxing and mentally preparing for New Moon which starts shooting in a few weeks (You are preparing right? because you will be working beside a depressed sourpuss, and we know that is totally her bag!)  Looks like your hair will be back to “Edwardian Perfection” in time, so no worries there!
Anywho, I just wanted to write, and say it’s SOOOOO good to see you .
(you have no idea!!)

Loves me,
Mrs. P. (as if you didn’t know)

Dear Rob,

Today I started going through the oodles of Google alerts I had and thank heavens! It was a relief to find out you spent the night in London being chased by prostitutes fans. (Hey- the look on your face says you were thinking the same thing!)

Good thing you had your bodyguard with you (who is that chick, really?) Anyhow, maybe it is time to come home. And by home I mean my house.




Mrs. P is back and raggin’ on Rob’s friends after the jump


63 Commented

South Barnes Police Dept. to the rescue- FOUND ROB

Dear Rob,

I see you were spotted by this girl:


Also, I apologize on behalf of the chick in this picture. I know you just wanted to be all in the pub, drinking, smoking, and wishing you were with cool people- like me, theMoonisDown & Leigh Anne from Lulaville who gets the biggest XOXO from me for taking me away from all the hot tub marketing I was involved in and bringing this to my attention. (also, I want you to know I was lonely here on the east coast- the only one in the WORLD working on MLK’s bday- usually by now theMoonisDown is up and talking to me on IM while at work- but she’s off today 🙁 boo… HOWEVER… I texted her the news that you were found and that got her ass out of bed! So yay! Thanks for being found b/c now I have a friend to chat with online!)

Glad you’re safe! Party it up!

Me (UnintendedChoice)

Source (as if it wasn’t obvious from the tag ruining the bottom half of Rob’s face- thanks Perez)

UPDATE: Mrs. P was SO kind as to crop out that girl for us so we could better envision ourselves next to him!


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