Outtakes from Rob’s Poems

I’m calling today “Fun Rob Friday” and Cath & Draska lead us into the world of Rob’s poetry!

Dear Rob,

To say the very, very least, we were intrigued by your report that you engaged in writing some, shall we say, risqué poetry during the filming of “Remember Me.” To quote you,

“I remember writing all these kind of pornographic poems, whenever there was a close-up on it. Horrible, horrible things in bold capital letters.”

As naturally curious people and stalwart lovers of literature of all kinds, we wanted to have the opportunity to read and analyze these poems for ourselves. But alas, we are unaware of the distribution of said titillating poems and to paraphrase some of your dialogue from “Remember Me”, the tale of these poems is “just there to tease us.”

Rob, we know that you don’t know this but, we were able to locate some poem outtakes from the ‘Remember Me’ time frame and beyond! It may have had something to do with a non-LTR-traditional use of a dumpster. As with any photo shoot that you do, there are some gems in the outtakes. Luckily -or sadly, depending how you look at it- for us, these outtake poems do not violate any decency standards and will not cause, ahem, ‘problems’ for the LTR blog.

By the way, we don’t know how you would define ‘pornographic poems…..horrible, horrible things’. What does that mean? Someone drank your last Heineken or ate the last Hot Pocket? It can’t be that there are no clean clothes left. Perhaps Marks & Sparks sold out of your choice of underwear? What? What does that mean to you? Does it involve fan fiction? Inquiring minds want to know.

It is our fond hope that you’re continuing to immortalize your poetic efforts; we wait with bated breath to be able, one day, to treasure your all poems. Here are your outtakes. We will refrain from using ‘bold capital letters’ as too many shouty capitals give us all headaches. No offense to you, of course…

Food

Feel your pockets
Sizzling
Spaghetti with sauce
Very hot
Shower
Wet Plaids
Cigarette

Crazy

Dear Sky,
Rumpled sheets
Dark clouds
Thunder Rain Hail
Straitjacket

Shopping

Blinding lights
Rodeo Drive
Dark cul-de-sac
Dumpster
Salvation Army
Yellow Mustard
Or Khaki?

Tee

Faded soft
Worn design
Peek-a-boo skin
Hotel sewing kit or mom?
Stoli

More after the jump!

Elephant

Peppermint
Tickle pockets
Lifted
Limbs a-flail
Warm moist maw
Rosie

Cap

Locks under
Gray wrap
Warm halo
During and after bar
Favorite
Beanie

Voice

Growl
Blues deep delta
Mojo tenor working
Sex rumble
Mumblish

Beverage

Green
Glass bottle
Opener
No pint
White foam
Dutch
Yum

Gesture

Yves
Beautiful friend
Kiss kiss
Gentleman
Middle finger, wrist
Oscar

Drive

Lost
Clown car
Exploding
Back up
Smokin’ dash

Land of the Rising Sun

Wolverine duet
Kobe meatballs
Excited trousers
Big in

Yours in poetic revelry,
Cath and drsaka

So LTR women, what other topics should Rob capture in free form verse? Show Rob your appreciation for the written word. Ready, steady, compose innuendo-laden verse!

No actual Robpoems were harmed in the writing of this letter.

I (UC) am going to try my hand at THIS!

Robsten

Massage Oil
Fire
Bear Skin Rug
Magicness
Real life Bella & Edward
Eating hot pockets off one another

Is that how it’s done!? TRY YOUR HAND AT A FREE FORM VERSE POEM!

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

128 Responses to “Outtakes from Rob’s Poems”

  1. robgirl86 says:

    Friend

    Tom
    London
    home
    my plaids
    my scripts
    sharing beds, NO sex
    two beanies
    TomSTu
    <3

    🙂

    Drsaka and Cath..LOVE LOVE LOVE the letter , and the pics…no words!!! <3

  2. chochang says:

    i think UntrueTweets got a valid outtake..

    A poem by Rob:

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    I like peanut butter
    So let’s f*ck.

  3. niahid says:

    Fans
    LTR Girls
    Dumpsters
    Boobs
    Pretty older ladies
    Teach me how to kiss

  4. tupelohoney says:

    Cath & drsaka,

    Love where you’re going with the CRAZY outtake…. but I dunno about the straight jacket part….

    Sounds kinda kinky……

    Love your letter!

  5. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by LetterstoTwilight. LetterstoTwilight said: It's time for a NEW LTR: Outtakes from Rob’s Poems – http://tinyurl.com/37kroqh […]

  6. robgirl86 says:

    Best blog

    LTR
    intelligent nuts hot girls
    me lurker
    dumpsters,
    elephants and
    details
    what is BIJ?
    cheers!

  7. JodieO says:

    Nikki, Kristen, Emilie
    all lies.
    Holding out for Gaga
    Let’s compare
    disco sticks

  8. robgirl86 says:

    Details

    boobs
    ass
    legs
    me hangover
    plaayyyerrrr
    gawddd…missed opportunity
    shit!

  9. melronin says:

    I seriously honestly love you girls.
    Great letter, amazing inspiration…

    And yes I am squeeezing my brain and pushing my inner
    muse very hard…but naaahhh…

    The only words that…pop into my mind are…

    sssseeexxx
    hard
    happy place
    man whore
    wootah
    caaandy
    moaning

    omg…horrible..horrible things!!!
    not very poetic, right??? 😀

  10. kat says:

    I thought the “elephant” poem was about One WHo Shall Not Be Named for a sec and was totally confused; however, I was set straight by “Rosie”. Then I realized you were channeling WFE.

    Is it bad that I think about the mulletphant whenever elephants are mentioned?

  11. Dionrenee says:

    Love the letter, need time to be creative but have to go to work!!!

    My pc at work does not allow me to post comments on here! WTF!!!

  12. Dionrenee says:

    Robspeak
    Dirt
    Nachos
    Candy
    Water
    New York

  13. That pic of Dear grandpa Pattinson made me LOL!
    Oh and the finger-porn Bel Ami pic..yeah made me lose track as well…damn he has got some really nice fingers..

  14. JellyBeanRainbow says:

    Wind in my hair
    Never
    Bald As JackN
    Never
    Beanie

  15. dazzledtodeath says:

    Cath & Drsaka-this is genius!

    Dream

    me
    you
    ride me
    Robgasm
    wake up
    so sad

  16. drsaka says:

    Dear UC, thank you for your verse. That’s how its done!

  17. Robgirl says:

    Hair
    Greasy
    Lickable
    Washed with “dirt”
    Yummy
    Touchable
    Fangirlgasm
    WINWIN

  18. che says:

    LMAO!!!!!!
    all of u gals

  19. The Old One says:

    I love this so much. Thanks for supplying the outtakes!

  20. robsfuturemate says:

    Great letter ladies! When I wake up a little more I’ll try my hand at a verse. But does anyone else think of “So I Married an Axemurderer”? Classic.

  21. Cath says:

    Love all of your creativity today girls! You rock!

    Here’s a Rob/ World Cup mash up one. (I’m Dutch, can’t help it)

    Gold
    Big succes
    Orange
    Heineken
    Many fans
    Love

  22. southernbelle says:

    I love the letter Cath and Drsaka!

    Here’s mine:

    Robsession

    Crazy
    Fangirling
    Stalking
    Fantasizing
    Blogging
    Going broke

  23. southernbelle says:

    I just thought of another one

    Robporn

    Hair
    Jaw
    Stubble
    Lips
    Long fingers
    Tight pants

  24. snowwhitedrifted says:

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    I’ve been in your bed
    with you and TomStu

    -the mullephant

  25. dazzledtodeath says:

    Rob provides endless inspiration.

    Long fingers
    Double jointed
    Could make a girl (me)
    so very
    happy

    mussed hair
    so beautiful
    to me
    you are
    perfect
    (marry me?)

  26. southernbelle says:

    The Many Faces of Robward (Fanfiction)

    Fifty *shades
    Domward
    Tattward
    Mafiaward
    Professorward (Dante)
    CEOward
    Docward
    Wide Awakeward

    LOL…sorry feel free to add! Not very inspirational but I thought I’d post it anyway!

    • Cath says:

      Darkward
      Addictward
      Wallbangerward
      Authorward
      Rockerward
      Britward
      Lawyerward
      Deadward (yes, am sorry, just reading one where he is)
      Nakedward
      Nerdward
      Gay/Slashward

      😉

  27. mountainlion says:

    Pants

    Tight
    Unbuttoned
    Unzipped
    Loose
    Rolled
    Bulges

  28. Cath says:

    Dear Rob,

    Did we come close??? Did we, did we, did we?
    *Jumps up and down while whining*
    Or were yours seriously X-rated?

    Love,

    Me

  29. mountainlion says:

    BONES

    Jawline
    Clavicle
    Ribs (Rips)
    Hips that push hard

  30. Mrs. P says:

    Confusion

    Candy
    Candy corn
    Corn on then cob
    Taycob
    Abs.

    The evolution of fish:

    Lobster
    Lobster bib?
    Baby bib
    Baby bump
    Bumpin’ uglies.

  31. Pfluffy says:

    Thinking

    trouble with
    over-analyze
    leave brain at the door
    mouth vomit
    thoughts and farts

    Face

    butt chin
    caterpillars
    invisalign, not
    soulful eyes
    inside own belly button
    imperfect, but yet…

    • Pfluffy says:

      I meant “word vomit” not “mouth vomit” – poetry fail.

      • drsaka says:

        Either way, its great! Very funny!

        • robsfuturemate says:

          Was just gonna say that! We knew what you meant! Thoughts, farts! Perfect!

        • Pfluffy says:

          I am suppose to be working but this letter inspired my inner poet and thinking up poems (especially ones about Rob) is a lot funner than what I am suppose to be working on… it’s Friday anyway so who really gets much real work done on a Friday.

          • drsaka says:

            Its always better to write about Rob; he’s such an inspiration, in many many ways!

    • Cath says:

      Free form poetry envy! Love your nick btw, Pfluffy, very poetic in it’s own right already! 😉

  32. Zees84 says:

    Holy Shnikies! The pic with the wedding ring? My ultimate finger porn.

    Ded.ded ded ded ded ded.

    I’m thinking there were some porn haikus in there.

  33. robsfuturemate says:

    Dear Rob,
    I’m not coming up with any poetry on my own today. Can you come over and help me out? I still have a couple Hot Pockets left? They’re pepperoni with a seasoned crust!! You can bring Rosie with you if you want, I’d love to see her again!

    Love,
    Your Mate

  34. mountainlion says:

    BD

    You
    Take
    It
    Out

  35. drsaka says:

    Everybody- thanks for your contributions! They’re great!

  36. robsfuturemate says:

    I was just lurking on LTT and almost every comment has a thumbs down! Wow! Glad we share the love over here! <3

    • JodieO says:

      Yeah, every now and then we get a thumbs-downer over there. Pity they never do anything more than thumbs down, really.

  37. adrienne says:

    i’ve tried for (five minutes) hours to come up with a regular poem and could only make a haiku that he might have made…

    With long fingers stole
    flannel from Remember Me.
    Need Hot Pockets now.

    i’m thinking someone with real skills can do way better than that…

  38. sjaantje says:

    I see a new LTR t-shirt coming soon! I’m ready, got my $5.00 off Cafe Press coupon from BK ready 🙂

  39. ForEveralurker says:

    Premiere

    London throbs. *Robbed
    Hard concrete
    Slumber
    Fan gals
    Easy pick?

    ——————-
    Sparkling toys
    Vampires
    Hard as rocks
    Smooth ice
    Supersonic thrusts
    Smoldering eyes
    Fan gal eclipsed
    By Rob?

  40. loey says:

    Smokin’

    Coffee cup
    Coffee cup
    Cigarette
    Lips
    Mouth
    Tongue
    Tastes like
    Smokey paradise
    Hot as pockets

    Wonk

    Wonky
    Foot akimbo
    Don’t run
    Just lie down
    Here
    Limbs akimbo
    Wonk me

    Plaid Buttons

    Start
    At the top
    And
    Work your way
    Down
    Then
    Things will
    Line up
    Slip it in
    The buttonhole

  41. dazzledtodeath says:

    and one more

    buttonflies
    bursting
    at the seams
    yum
    i like

  42. Robgirl says:

    Hot Pockets
    Cheesy
    Hot
    Saucy
    You in a nutshell
    Can you
    Take me
    Instead of
    The hot pocket?

    Eclipse
    Sparkle less
    Make out with Kstew
    Grab TayTay’s boob
    Why does Peter have a british/southern accent?
    I’m really hot
    But don’t know it

    Word Vomit
    What did I say
    In that interview
    About vajayjays?
    I’m so awesome

    My Smile
    Like stars
    Crooked like Edward
    I’ll help you
    Smile more
    *wink wink*

    -Love super Rob fangirl

  43. loey says:

    Not Holding Hands

    I liked
    Her
    Enough
    To deny
    They paid
    Enough
    Just smile
    Just sigh
    Paparazzi
    Will
    Try to
    Untie
    The truth & the lie
    Enough
    Magazines
    Buy

    Tom/Rob

    Exquisite
    Tippler
    Stunning
    Filmster
    By the
    Dumpster
    Dazzling
    Mate
    No mirrors
    We look
    At each other
    That’s why
    We
    Share
    Shirts

    Dirty

    Once joked
    Dirty
    They echoed
    Unclean
    Check my
    Hands
    (I know you do)
    Clean
    Fingernails
    Holding pen
    To paper
    Writing
    DIRTY
    PORN
    UNCLEAN

  44. Robgirl says:

    Ode to Fangirls

    Screaming
    Fainting
    5000 future
    Mrs. Pattinson’s
    Marry me?

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