We celebrate 4th of July with Rob like it’s 2009

Dear Rob,

This is our 3rd 4th of July together. We’ve shared with you how to play volleyball & grill the proper hot dog (well, sorta), taught you about proper Independence Day attire (shirtless with a US Flag bandanna around your hair) and even instructed you on how to set off fireworks without a trip to the hospital (okay, we didn’t do any of those things, but we really hope to some day), but nothing, and I mean NOTHING, compares to what we told you in 2009 on the 4th of July. So because it’s been two year and you probably forgot (and also because I have an EPIC 4th of July party to go to in about 15 minutes called “You’re Welcome America” and I have no time to come up with fresh content) I give you our 4th of July from 2 years ago:

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US Flag5420Dear Rob,

Happy 4th of July from your favorite Americans UC & Moon! I know this day isn’t a very happy one in British history since our country beat your country’s ass in a war. But I think we can work through it. We can turn it into a little game. I (UC) went to college in the south and some people don’t seem to be over The Civil War yet (I understand- it was recent- mid 1800s..) They called me a Yankee. Wtf? I never even heard the word “Yankee” till I went to college and found out that apparently I am one. (Yankee= from the north… I think… any southerners wanna help me out?)

We had good times in college, pretending with my friends that we gave a damn about a war fought so long ago. We’d be walking to class and I’d pass a friend from Georgia and I’d say, “I’m gonna getcha in Gettysburg.” And then he’d say, “But I’m gonna win in Spotsylvania!” It was a hoot!

So whadayasay? Should we do something similiar to what I did with my southern friends in college? Like, I can call you up and say, “Yo Limey- put on your red coat and get over here to celebrate the US signing the declaration of Independence from your country” And you’d come over, wearing your red coat because you’re such a good sport, and I’d be in my blue coat. And if you bring me some tea I could say, “Hell no! I don’t want your tea. I’m gonna dump this tea overboard into the waters in Boston.” Imagine all the jokes we could make..

Or we could forego all the history ideas (cuz seriously those 4 things above took me a 1/2 hour to look for on wikipedia) and just celebrate the 4th of July the good ol’ American way- hot dogs, hamburgers, deviled eggs, volley ball, watermelon, throwing up on the volley ball court because you played too soon after eating the hot dogs, hamburgers and deviled eggs, refueling after your purging with more hot dogs, a dip in the pool, playing Born in the USA 100 times and then switching to your mix of Lee Greenwood, Bruce Springstreen & Toby Keith. And capping off the night with an amazing backyard firework display where this phrase is usually heard: ‘Shit… they didn’t go off. Someone go see why. No you go. No you. GET THE FOUR YEAR OLD AWAY. We will never do this again. These are supposed to be foul-proof fireworks! Get Uncle Joe- he’ll check it out” and Uncle Joe does check it out. And then the rest of the night is spent in the ER, with Uncle Joe, who has a black hand and is now completely bald as opposed to half-way bald. Oh and don’t forget to wear a flag somewhere on your body (looks like Moon took care of that for you- cute!)


I’m a cool rocking Daddy in the U.S.A.,
UnintendedChoice & The MoonisDown

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Aww! How sweet. I also took the liberty (ha) to photoshop some new American Rob pictures:

Here is one where Rob is proud to be an American:

Here is one where the Statue of Liberty gets a surprise:

Happy 4th of July!!!

UC & Moon

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14 Responses to “We celebrate 4th of July with Rob like it’s 2009”

  1. robgirl86 says:

    Happy Independance Day to all American girls here today <3 (& i really hope none of you will throw up anything today 🙂 )

    a letter from 2009…le sigh*, those were the days..
    when a certain brit had no clue about what's the difference inbetween 4th of July and Thanksgiving (history lessons…hello ello?) )

    "on the 4th of July in England we just sacrif….." (WITH move 🙂 )


    • dazzledtodeath says:

      yes, those were the days..who knew two years later we’d be getting all sentimental for the good old days?? Still adore Rob as much as ever..

      Happy Fourth to all who celebrate! Hope all the rest of you are having a good Monday (is this possible?).

    • Love that vid! Classic Rob

  2. Dionrenee says:

    Happy 4th…love the Proud to be an American Rob’s sex hair!! I miss that hair!! I seriously have Rob-withdrawal….how many damn days til November what?

  3. drsaka says:

    Happy 4th everyone!

  4. Nelle says:

    The Statue of Liberty, the flag, and jumpin’ Rob! Life doesn’t get any better. Thanks UC and Moon and Happy 4th!

  5. melronin says:

    Lot of love and hugs from Greece!
    Enjoy the day!


  6. Jessica says:

    Happy 4th! 😀
    My family’s coming over later!
    And so is Rob! (lol, I wish)

  7. Katycougar says:

    Can it get any better then this………….. unless Rob was here, I would have to say NO!

    I love how enthiusiastic Rob is with his American Flag and his Uncle Sam Hat. It warms the cockles of my heart to see him that excited next to the Statue of Liberty.

    Spend that money baby any way you want to. Tell you what we need a few bottles of tequila and maybe another case of beer. The Barbeque is ready and we have more then enough food.

    Nothing like a bunch of drunk patriotic Americans lighting up ilegal fireworks. That’s the way we do it in the VC. Don’t worry we have the water hose ready. I even went so far as to invite a few fireman pals, yeah they are paramedics. It sometimes comes in handy. They are bringing the kegger.

    Don’t be late. We start at 1:00. That way we are relaxed enough for the fireworks. We got it all. The sand and the surf is just a few doors down. You will hear the music when you pull up. Sorry no country music but I know a few guys who like to “Bump and Grind”. Yeah we will be singing and making fools of ourselves.

    Happy 4th everyone. Yes even my British friends. Get you asses over here. We will show you how we do it American style.

  8. Happy 4th friends!! Just thinking this is only my 2nd 4th with you all but it’s been wonderful!!

    What’s better than a Patriotic Jumping Rob? not much, I tell ya.

  9. Vera says:

    I am so proud to write a few words in english , even the poorest english vocabulary ever written. So that I can talk for myself.

    So I want to share some obvious statements about independence.


    Any other way of living is dangerous.

    Happy July 4th for all of you independent american women.

  10. Vera says:

    Dear Rob,

    I didn´t watch WFE, I’ve been too busy dealing with not so interesting things, wasting my precious time.

    hopefully you will get rid of Edward and make the best Erik possible.

    Good luck with Cosmopolis.

  11. pukesten says:

    happy 5th of July hang over! hope everyone had a good 4th!!

  12. L says:

    moon and u.c. you always have the best robimages ever! happy 4th indeed 🙂

    also, i’d like to imagine that in the photo with his patriotic underwear, rob is also singing his own version of “proud to be an american”….

    “cause i’m proud to be a twihard, where the fanfic is so sexxxyyyy/ and i’m proud to earn, so much cash, with glitter all over my bodyyyyy/ i run my fingers through my hair, and answer questions awkwardlyyyy/ though i film in canada, i’ll never forget, that my paychecks are from L.A.!”

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