Am I a better person or a raving lunatic because of you?
Wondering if Moon is back YET!? I just might tell you, but first read this wonderful letter from MariaCecila
Dear Rob,
I just came back from swanning around the south of France for two weeks’ vacation with friends, and I had to stop and reflect over the question of whether my obsession with you and Twilight has made me a better, more well-informed person than before, or if it has made me a monomaniac lunatic.
Wanna hook-up in the back of my car that kinda looks like a mini-van?
Item 1. When we arrive at the airport and go to the car rental company to check out our Ford, we are informed that we have this cool, black Volvo instead. I squeal, not because of the additional safety and space, but because, I tell my friends “That is just like the car Edward drove Bella in the movie Eclipse!!” Dumbfounded friends and unsure smiles, and I decide not to elaborate on how it should really have been silver, but I snap a discrete picture just the same.
Item 2. When we arrive at our rented house in the charming French village close to the Pyrenees, I find that above my bed is a – dreamcatcher! I squeal, not because of the big bed, the charming 18th century house or the amazing view of the mountains but because “That is so much like the dream catcher Jacob gave Bella in New Moon!” Crooked smile from husband coupled with an eye-roll tells me that this is not the time to elaborate on the plot of New Moon and the Jacob vs Edward issue. Since I am Switzerland I keep my mouth shut and go out to have a three course dinner with my friends in the warm summer night instead.
You drove to Spain to see me!?
Item 3. I insist that we drive across the border to nearby Spain to visit Salvador Dali’s hometown Figueres, and once we’ve seen the museum, I drag my friends around town to find the-artist-formerly-played-by-Rob’s birth house. It’s a quite ordinary house in an ordinary street, and my friends seem unable to understand why I feel I have to take a picture of it.
Item 4. I then insist that we drive out to the coast, to visit the small town where the-artist-formerly-played-by-Rob spent his summers and the place by the sea where he built his house, and on the road I squeal repeatedly when a) I tell my friends that this looks JUST like those hills where Rob, I mean Dali, biked around with his dear friend, the famous writer Gabriel Garcia Lorca, and b) this bay is JUST like the bay where Rob, I mean Dali, went moonlight skinny dipping with his friend Lorca. The rest of the party is seemingly unimpressed by my extensive knowledge of the life of Dali.
Item 5. When a local fiesta bring people in quaint costumes out milling around and dancing in the streets and square, I can’t help remarking to my friends how much this reminds me of the tradition of yearly celebrating the absence of vampires in the Italian medieval town of Volterra, which is really very much like the French town Carcassonne that we visited the other day. After some incredulous looks I hasten to add that while of course Volterra is a real town, I myself have never been there, so I wouldn’t know for sure about this celebration from personal experience, it was just in this movie I saw…
This spot of dock should be the 8th wonder of the world!
Item 6. I completely fail to persuade my friends that we should take a day’s drive to see Cannes, since my best argument seems to be that I want to see if I can “find that spot where Rob was photographed on the quay wearing that striped shirt”. Instead we go to the beach, and I can’t help pointing out to my husband how much a young guy who is wind surfing resembles Taylor Lautner. My husband just huffs and asks me to rub some sun lotion on his back.
Item 7. When we visit a market one evening in a charming seaside town, I am unable to leave and go home because, as I explain to my friends, there is this bracelet which I don’t know if I should buy or not, because it looks remarkably like Bella’s bracelet, but then again this is clearly not Navajo handicraft, so it is not really like Bella’s bracelet, only it is the one copy I’ve seen so far that is most like it, but of course, I am not quite sure that this is a genuine turquoise since the bracelet only costs 25 dollars, but 25 bucks is 25 bucks and…this is where my husband gently starts dragging me by my shoulders to the car.
So, I know a lot more now about car makes, Spanish artists and writers, Indian handicraft, medieval architecture and traditional religious celebrations, and I am well informed about a lot of places where I myself have never been. Does this make me a wiser, better informed person, or just an obsessed lunatic who references almost everything I see either to Twilight or to you, Rob? I really need to know.
P.S. I read a copy of In Touch – in Spanish – that I found on the plane, just because they had some pictures of you at the press conference at Comic Con. It was trash, but I couldn’t help myself. Just a lapse in judgement. Sorry. But at least now I know that Daniel Radcliffe doesn’t use Q-tips. Do you?
Sincerely,
MariaCecilia
Maria, I don’t know about the rest of them, but the only thing I think about ALL of the above is That’s Normal!
Guess what?
Even the Sexy Sax man is excited Moon is back! (Picture courtesy of our dear friend, Kim!)
Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store
Tags: , Fan letter, Moon is back!, Rob Pattinson, robert pattinson, that's normal
« Dreams about Rob Pattinson | So many Excuses… »
You are totally normal, MariaCecilia. And it’s totally fun seeing the world through a Twilight lens! I too am in the closet for the most part, because almost no one except my husband tolerates/understands. I am training my daughter to say, “There’s Edward’s car!” when we see the Twilight Volvo. She’s catching on quite nicely.
I think I would have gone for a swim myself, in the same water where Rob, I mean Dali, went moonlight skinny dipping with his friend Lorca, just in case the same molecules of water that touched his naked body were still there.
You need to teach her to say “Mommy’s boyfriend” when she sees a picture of Rob.
“Mommy’s boyfriend”, haha.
Alas, she is more of the age that she might dream of him as HER boyfriend. I don’t want to think about having a crush on her boyfriends of the future. Just don’t want to go there. Yikes.
One of my favorite Rob stories (which I’ve told here before, but it’s worth telling again) is about when I was out shopping around the time that Eclipse came out in DVD. There was a huge photo of Robward on display by the DVDS. A little girl around 2-3 years old came running up pointing at the display yelling, “Bu-fuh! Bu-fuh!”. I looked at her with a puzzled expression on my face until her mom caught up with her and said, “Yes, honey, you’re right…. that IS mommy’s boyfriend”. The mom and I exchanged wide knowing smiles. LOL!
Love the way you describe it as a “knowing smile”. That mom would fit right in with LTT/R.
“Mommy’s boyfriend”! That would be adorably weird – too bad I don’t have a daughter that age. I guess I will just have to hypnotize my god-daughters instead next time I baby-sit them! Must remember to bring my laptop for plenty of training pictures..
Oh, I’ve trained my nephews! Not that they go for it when I tell them that’s Uncle Rob. They tell me, No that’s Woburt Pattason!
Dang! Why didn’t I think of that?? 😉
Hilarious letter ! I can relate if I ever get to Cannes I am totally getting my picture taken on that particular wooden dock area !!!! Ha ha
Fun letter! Totally NORMAL!
The way I see it, the next best thing to being with Rob is being able to see Rob everywhere you look. (And it’s only crazy if you actually think are are seeing Rob, versus just seeing objects and places that remind you of him in the most tangential way). The dream catcher, the Volvo, the bracelet – I mean, it’s like a sign from the cosmos telling you that you must go on in your obsession (do not quote me on that).
But on a crazy note, I do sometimes pretend Rob is walking toward me, as I’m walking to work. I try to think about how I might react. Pull the gut in, stand tall, smile. It’s a fun little game, to pretend that he’ll be there when I turn the corner, makes the boring 15 minute walk to work down the same old city streets fun. Sometimes there are guys on the street who look sort of like Dean and I get all excited, thinking that THIS might be the day he’s ACTUALLY on the street. I also sometimes pretend Rob will be there when the elevators open to my floor at work. Also a fun game, though people waiting to get into the elevator probably wonder why I’m standing in the elevator with my eyes closed, lips out, waiting for my kiss.
What if Rob actually DID suddenly appear in front of you one day? I would probably blush and be unable to stop a big silly grin on my face, and generally behave like a 12-year-old fangirl. Poor Rob.
See,now, I just don’t get screaming fans. How can you actually open your mouth and have volume come out of it when you can’t even breathe?
I’d try realllly hard to say something, and it would come out in a teeeeny tiny mouse voice. Something like “i’m uh, natteringyeahrobber from LTR…would you like my autograph…i mean er…can I have your autograph…i mean” but he’d hear it as “ssshhhpsssspphhhsshtttyyy” and think I was an idiot and go on to the next person on the street.
I love it.
Can you see all of us waiting for the elevator…………..
Eyes closed……..lips out………….Yeah you got your Rob on.
I can see it now: An elevator full of professional, ready, willing, eager and Totally Normal fans of Robert Pattinson.
Dean…can you handle it????
Dean would be trampled – in a polite, wellbehaved way of course – as we swarm in for our kisses like a hive of bees. He would probably have an interesting learning experience and be a better person for it!
Oh, that’s totally normal – I often “meet” Rob coming back from workout, biking over the fields. Either it’s my reaction to an adrenaline high or I just need the encouragement after the workout (thank you Rob!).. Next time, I won’t forget to pout!
Rob runs with me. Quite frequently. In my mind at least. Especially on my 7-10 milers. He keeps me going.
Totally normal, right? 😉
Hey, my robsession helps me keep up on current events. My sixth grade teacher would be so proud. (I think.)
Great letter MC and you are now a normal well-informed person because of Rob! “The artist formerly played by Rob.” Genius!
I too feel the need to inform people of “what I read”. You know, Spanish artists, French novelists, elephants and early circus days. But since I’m out about Rob I usually get the Twiight patented eye roll. Prime example…
Mom(after talking to someone at the door about my cat): See how I didn’t tell them you named your cat after Robert Pattinson?
Me (thinking): ummm, my cat is called Londyn. NOT Robert Pattison.
I can’t get away with anything even though I’m always “reading”!! (yep, sometimes my info is not from a book, sue me)
Are you trying to get me committed? I should have been institutionalized years ago. There was that one incident……. Ex Husband…..Water…..blow dryer….. Well I won’t dwell on it if you don’t mind. The past is the past.
Dear Rob,
I like that you have the foresight to plan ahead. Just like me you are prepared to shop. You never know when you are going Home Depot. You know they are having a sale on potting soil and plywood. We have the room, so my neighbors with the hot sports car be dammed. You know that they envy us.
I want to break a few things down for you. Maria wanted to address something today. I am going to do my best to defend you here and let me know if there is more that we need to discuss with them.
1. As they say “Safety First.” Just like a Boy Scout you are always prepared. You get a badge for this.
Disclaimer: Hey baby you know I never mention TMTSNBN, so that has nothing to do with this.
2. Dream catcher……. You know I hated New Moon. Reason………You weren’t in it enough. Loved the result……..”Remember Me.” I worry about the French sometimes. You know as well as I do that it all started with the French Fries. They haven’t been the same since.
3. Spain…….. Mustache….enough said.
4. You…..Naked……..Water. Get rid of the guy. Sorry I think my head may explode.
5. We are back to New Moon……. The one part I liked……you being flung around…..fighting…the red cloak…….No comment.
6. All I have to say here is that by not going to Cannes…….. Your friends failed you. Next trip it is a must. You can tell her about the cool breezes off the water that flutter your hair.
7. If it involves SWSNBN then forget the shopping. We agree that you should save your money Maria. I know you would go to a real Indian Reservation and spend your money on Hot Dogs….. Best $25 you will ever spend. You even get a hit off a Peace Pipe. Oh the memories…………
Baby loves his Q-tips.
Our suggestions: It is time for Maria to take another trip, leave the hubby at home, pick better friends, and find Rob.
Rob and I want to know who the guy is playing the sax with the skinny suspenders. This has all kinds of wrongness on it. Skinny suspenders…….what the hell?
Noone wears suspenders………..excuse me………sexpenders like Rob.
http://tinyurl.com/3bkpbpu
or
http://tinyurl.com/3hzdvxb
or
http://tinyurl.com/qam79m
When he drops them, like in the 3rd pic, ……I die a slow death….
And with the shirt opened just so…GAH!!!
*fans herself* Why is it suddenly so hot in here? Gah – now I have to add sexpenders to the list of things that remind me of Rob. Too bad the only man I know who uses them on a daily basis is my 60-year-old choir conductor, who resembles Big Daddy more than anyone else… 🙁
MariaCecilia, this sounds like my dream vacation. I don’t know what was wrong with your husband and friends, I guess they just didn’t get it.
Story of my life – no one understands me. That’s why I need YOU guys! <3
Great, great letter. I hope I’ll get the chance to do a “Rob Tour” of Europe one of these days.
Yes, my Robsession has exposed me to many cool, cultural, etc. things that I otherwise would never have explored. It’s also turned me into a (still sometimes closeted) raving lunatic. Yes, I’ve read WFE and BA which were wonderful. But Cosmopolis and Ballad of the Sad Cafe???? WTF?? I do spend a lot more time listening to Van Morrison, but Wu Tang?? I mean, come on. Really??
Also, living in LA, I’ve lit’rally become insane with the hope that I may run into Rob, well….almost anywhere. I gawk into every car waiting in line at In-n-Out. I live not too far from Norman’s Guitar Shop and will go out of my way to slowly drive by the place. I never go in, but I thoroughly search the parking lot looking for any tall, lanky guy wearing an LB baseball cap. If I’m in Beverly Hills, Century City, Silver Lake, West LA, Santa Monica or Sherman Oaks, it’s amazing that I haven’t rear-ended any cars in front of me dut to all the time I spend looking into other cars hoping to glimpse a flaming dashboard.
Last weekend I had brunch at a 5-star resort in Palos Verde. While others in my party were admiring the architecture and the ocean views, I was scanning the crowd at the outdoor dining area just in case a certain british millionaire decided to spend his morning at the beach.
My daughter lives in West LA and we often eat at cool little cafes and restaurants. I’m always surreptitiously glancing around at all the corner tables in case HHH might be dining at some hip out-of-the-way locale.
And during all this, my mind is working on what I would do or say if (and when) that gorgeous hunk of man actually appeared before my eyes.
So it’s obvious, Rob has had minimal effect on my life. (mmm hmm). Yep. I’m sure that this is all totally normal, but I think the description of “raving lunatic” is a better fit.
Totally normal…………minimal effect.
It is perfectly sane to be star gazing at the local fine food establishments. One day he will come out of a back door of In-N-Out and you will be right there to help him to his car, after fending off the paparazzi.
You are providing a service here. Think of yourself as a member of Rob’s army, always on the alert. Remember Kiss…….
http://tinyurl.com/3rq49l3
Should I admit this?
I love it. From now on I will totally rationalize my actions as a soldier in Rob’s army. Always at the ready to serve and protect! Yep, yep. I KNEW I was normal!!!
Rob – I’m ready to serve. Your every need. Call me.
Our Commander In Chief.
http://i1211.photobucket.com/albums/cc421/katy67/rpavi6.jpg
Yes I think this is worth protecting.
Rob’s Army! Brilliant idea for a t-shirt! Where do I sign up?
Looking for Real Rob when you are in a place where he might even remotely likely be is Too Normal for words: it had me tripping over my own feet last summer, when I was in the States, every time I walked into an airport. Keep looking, girl!
I’ll admit slight disappointment that there was no Wedgie Sam in the Moon is back picture. He is the new Jumping Rob, after all.
Normal!
GREAT letter! I love being reminded that, I, too, am totally normal! (Because sometimes I feel like I’m a raving lunatic for doing all of the above.)
I just came back on an ass-long ride on a night train from hiking one week in the northern mountains in 10 degrees Centigrade and cold drizzling rain. (This is what we Scandinavians do at home for fun in our vacation time!) Finding UC’s e-mail that my letter made the post just put a big smile on my face again – thank you for making my summer! (Still crazy, after all these years…)
That Moon photo looks like a huge heart-shaped hole has been punched in Rob’s chest. I knew Moon’s Kung-Fu was strong… but not that strong.