Hackers SUCK! And we love Rob

You spent your entire Sunday doing WHHHHAATTT???

Dear LTR-ers

In case you didn’t know, hackers SUCK balls. Yea, crude but true. Due to some loser in Russia/Eastern Europe/Indonesia/Nigeria/My neighbors basement, UC and I spent most of Sunday reinstalling Letters to Twilight completely. Not, your site Rob… you never give us trouble (besides the haggard beard and the Robsten thing and the frowny faces and and and….) So yea, it sucked (like the hackers). Give a big round of applause to UC for being a super trooper and getting us back to this state while I obscenely tweeted our server company Media Temple. Truly, they are good people and I even meant part of what I said in those tweets, but that’s the beside the point. All this to say we’re going to bed and NOT posting for Monday as you can understand. We’ll be back tomorrow.

So WHO do I need to punch?

As for the forum… that’s down till further notice. Hopefully, it will be up ASAP but we could only tackle one thing at a time. I’m sure you understand.

Stay up to date with what’s going on with LTT/LTR 24/7 by following us on Twitter!


PS UC, you rule. No really.

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

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Posted in: Rob
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Rob: Bringing friends together

Rob- So…… I got drunk last night. like really drunk. You see (UC- hollaaaa) I met @lula34 when I went on vacation last week & she left me with a delicious bottle of South African Shiraz- which happens to be my favorite. Mr. Choice left the house & I popped open the bottle and drank half of it myself. Then I tried to stand up. Bad idea. Turns out I couldn’t. So, I made a video with my alter ego Merv the Perv for my personal blog (yes, I have one of those) and called it a night. THEN I remembered I had to write to you! AY CARUMBA! Thankfully, SingleStrand sent us a story today that just had to be shared. Grab a glass of wine & get ready for a story to warm your heart:

Dear Rob,

Do you realize that you are the common denominator for a lot of ladies out there? Like do you ever stop and think, “Damn, a lot of ladies in this world have come (twss) together because of me”? Because I think that a LOT.

A few months ago, a group of girls that met on this very site decided we HAD to get together, like in real life. We started planning (there were gdocs, tweets, and email threads so long I started comparing them to your peen) and soon we had dubbed our very own Rob event H00rfestInTheMidwest, #HFitMW for short, because that’s totes normal.

Before I knew it, husbands were being asked (with surprisingly few hjs and bjs required), babies and furbabies were pawned off on somewhat responsible parties, and party favors were brainstormed and created. I was so excited!

And then, about a week before, I realized I was…nervous. In just a few days, MeteorMuse and I were driving 3 hours to meet allryans, KeishaBird, lunabella23, SaritaPagita, and TLG/Tippy for REAL. What if they didn’t like me? What if they were all ‘normal’ but I was just kind of weird? What if, as Mr. Tippy was convinced, they were actually a bunch of gross old dudes trying to get fresh with some chick they met on the interwebs?

Well Rob, I overcame my fears and took the plunge. And you know what? It was amazeballs. Initial introductions weren’t even necessary as the conversation just flowed from the first second we walked in the door. We laughed so hard we cried at the Rob captions Tippy came up with for our favors. SaritaPagita will go down (twss) in history as PattinsonPantsLady2 for creating HFitMW tee shirts for us all featuring Eclipseward and Rob BIJ pictures. Allryans and Tippy graced us with dramatic readings of select fanfic stories and I went to bed at like 11pm because I’m lame. But then MeteorMuse came to bed and snuggled with me so it was okay (are you turned on yet Rob?). We leghitched your poster, we took Pocket Eddie everywhere with us and, finally, after much analysis of THAT photo, we all agreed to disagree on the peen vs. cell phone controversy.

When it was time to go home, I didn’t want to go. I wanted to stay in this alternate version of real life for another week, month, year, and just revel in the fact that I must be normal if all these ladies were just like me. Right?

It’s only been 2 ½ weeks since #HFitMW and I miss those h00rs like crazy. Instead of everything I see reminding me of you or Twilight, things remind me of one of my new group of girls. Like the avocado I’m eating right now will always remind me of allryans commenting that she might orgasm just at the sight of her avocado crepe at our Sunday brunch (seriously Rob, you’ve got to be turned on by now). And every time I think of Eclipseward, I’ll think of KeishaBird and the way she whimpered in the theater when we went to the Saturday matinee and you came on screen. I won’t hear Buttcrack Santa again without thinking of lunabella23 and how excited she was to bring little bottles of booze to our weekend (and how disappointed I was that at 7 months pregnant, I couldn’t partake). I’ll never have a conversation with MeteorMuse without thinking that our friendship now totally rivals the bromance our husbands have shared for a year or more. Hopefully, KeishaBird and lunabella23 are NOT reminded of us when they are in the shower using the awesome soaps they bought on our quick shopping stroll, cuz that would be a little creepy…or sexy (you decide, Rob).

Can I be honest with you Rob? Although #HFitMW appeared to focus around you and/or Twilight, if you took those parts away, I still would have had an epic time. These ladies are smart and witty and fun. They have families and friends and jobs and the same mild fanfiction habit/Rob obsession as I have. OK so like I said before, maybe you’re the common denominator…but you definitely are NOT the sum total (God, I’m a math nerd). Let’s say our Robsession wanes one day. I mean, not likely right? But let’s say it does. You’ll fade to the background and I won’t even know what movie you are working on much less where you are every few hours of each day. But I hope and pray that my girls and I are on #HFitMW32. That would be awesomesauce.

Love ya but I guess I don’t really need ya,


Thanks to : SingleStrand, allryans, KeishaBird, lunabella23, MeteorMuse, SaritaPagita, Tippy/TLG

AWWWW!! I love happy stories such as this. So you know OUR story- Moon & I become closer friends blah blah blah- we meet a bunch of people like those we talk about all the time- Our Philly girls, the LA crew & all those who we’ve met as a result- but what about you? Who have YOU met because of “Rob?” Are you STILL without a Rob/Twi friend? B/c that can’t be… we need to REMEDY that! Who do you want to meet in this fandom more than anyone!?  Besides Merv the Perv of course?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

169 Commented

While Moon was Gone

As of press time (aka 5:52 pm on Sunday evening while in my pink robe & before heading out the door to see PAUL MCCARTNEY (yes, a Beatle! WEE) I haven’t even spoken to Moon yet except through a few text messages. She’s home. She’s safe. She’s exhausted. I’m sure she is going through a transition of going from a 3rd world country back to LA…. where the world’s couldn’t be any different. So while we can’t wait to hear from her and ALL about her trip…. I thought we’d give her a day or so to debrief. And talk about how much we missed her and how much she missed!!!

Dear Moon,

Don’t you EVER do that to me again- leave me for that long. ESPECIALLY when amazing stuff happens like Robsteners tweet about RESPECTing R+K and Rob visits Kristen in Moantreal! I mean he smiled in her presence and the collective Robsten population sighed and awwed. I heard their screams all the way at the beach in South Carolina (although that could’ve just been the cougar in the house next to me… she looked like she probably believed in the magicness) But seriously. It was awful having you gone. I know you were doing “good” helping the “poor” and “motherless” and stuff in “Africa” but seriously. I need you. So no more.

I wasn’t the only one doing all the missing- everyone ELSE missed you too.. so much that I got so many “While Moon was Gone” letters & emails & tweets that I started to stop missing you because all the missing was clogging up our clean inbox (and by “clean” I mean I actually got it under 500 unread emails for about 2 days! Yay me!) But anyway, here are some thoughts to prove that I and all the LTRers really did think of you each and every day. We thought you’d want to know what Rob has been up to…. and what made us think of you while you were saving the world:

WE MISSED THE ANNIVERSARY (major blogging Fail)

And Robsten4life (of course!) reminded us:

“While Moon was Gone she missed the one year anniversary of the shot heard… errr SEEN around the world.

Seriously will she ever take another picture in her life that caused so much controversy?? [UC note: I kinda hope she got one of a Zebra & Lion mating in Africa… just to one-up last year’s 08/07/09]”

Ron & an Oscar

From @JanetRigs

While Moon was gone Ron got nominated for an Oscar on Twitter, no less than 5 months before the OSCAR nominations are released to the rest of the masses. What’s more surprising is that it is for a movie that had not yet completed filming or even been released.

You know what it is? Magicness


While Moon was gone Rob was drinking classic Coca Cola and Coke Zero. My mind went directly to Moon and me: we like Diet Coke.- Darja

Rob, Kristen, & TomStu went to Montreal

And it was dubbed MOANtreal by some brilliant Robstener- I KNOW… so much we’ll have to say once you’re unpacked and have slept more than 12 hours in 2 weeks: OperaRose shared:

“I am also away most of the time you are this month, but in between my major travels tonight I hopped onto Twitter and it was exploding with the news that Rob, KStew, and – wait for it – TomStu, were all spotted in my home city of Montreal tonight having dinner.

So, being the generous Montrealer I am, I invited them via tweet to my 2nd (for my husband’s endless number of extended Italian relatives) wedding reception this Saturday night in Montreal.

I will let you know if they show up.

A copy of my 3 tweet-invites to them:

Dear Robsten, if u would like 2 come 2 my reception Sat night in Montreal DM me. No one will know you, they’re all old world Italians

& Robsten, I promise all the old Italians at my party in Montreal Sat. night will respect you. nice. and. slow. that is all.

Also Robsten: if you come to my party in Montreal, plz note dress code is plaid and as a gift please bring me your magicness. See you Sat.

Normal by a dumpster

I found myself standing outside of a reception hall, talking on my phone, standing by a dumpster.

Instead of moving to a more desirable location, I stayed and prepared for the inevitable influx of Hot British Men.

Totally Normal.

Thanks LTR.


We all scream for… Nutty Buddy’s

I missed this news, but apparently Rob was caught saying hello to an ice cream man. Brandi wrote:

“All variations of the ice cream treat, Nutty Buddy, sold out across the world. In a related story, becoming an ice cream truck driver is now the aspiration of every warm blooded female in the U.S.

Dick’s been annoyed… or something (big effin’ reminder to break THIS down)

whilst moon was gone , Rob made a plea for Moon to leave his Dad alone !!!!!!!

love Robz and the flat girls x

I laughed at this

Sent to us by Mely Cruz

And seriously… that’s not all that happened… SO MUCH MORE did.. so much that.. I think we need help figuring out WHAT to tackle first- so fine LTR readers & Rob-lovers, what is beggin’ for a Moon & UC break-down? Besides the obvious “Reasons why Rob went to Moantreal that have nothing to do with Kristen Stewart” Since we never plan to RESPECT the magicness (we’re too jealous) What should we break down!?? I didn’t yet watch or see ANYTHING from Teen Choice awards. Should we guess whether or not Rob went Uncle Jesse Chic or Plaid Lumberjack couture? Help us narrow it down!

Missed you. Also this day is forever dubbed Moanday. Thank you Robstener,

OH PS… I will take this opportunity to alert you to the video I made (in public) on the beach last week for you: In the car with UC (on the beach)

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

86 Commented

While Moon is Gone

Pssst- this is not a daily letter- just an informational post. Don’t freak out!

Dear people who love Moon (including you, Rob),

Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock, you’ve probably heard that Moon left on Thursday 7/29 for Kenya where she will be for 14 days. I know. I’m dying! Don’t worry- we’re still bringing you LTR every day… thanks to the amazing letter submissions from all you talented writers (I’m still looking for some so e-mail me if you have a great letter!)

I want to keep a journal or log of everything Moon misses while she’s away. Perhaps it’ll be turned into a video. Perhaps it’ll just be an EPIC blog post, but I need your help! If you think of something about Moon while she’s gone- or see or read something she might like… whether hilarious, random, awesome, totally lame- let me know. Email me with the subject “While Moon was Gone.” Like did you drive through McDonalds to grab a happy meal for your kid and the guy in the window looked exactly like Big Daddy? THAT’S what Moon is missing! Help me make her homecoming (which I’m already counting down for) AMAZING.



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Posted in: LTR, Rob
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This is how you found us!?

Dear LTR fanatics & the occasional passer-byers via Google,

It’s been awhile since we’ve dove into the deep end of the blog statistics- in fact, we haven’t done it once since we moved to the new blog. (And may have never done it at LTR- we used to do it all the time over at LTT!) Are you still googling creepy shit to end up at LTR? Are you still misspelling words just as badly as you were a year ago? Let us find out. Here is what you’ve been googling lately to find us at Letters to Rob:

what white actor is dating someone white- I’ll take Angelia Jolie & Brad Pit for $200. Wait no… I know this one…Zac Efron & Vanessa Hudgens? No? How about Taylor Swift & Taylor Swift? Ooh Oohh- Nikki Reed  Paris Lastis? Damn- WHO is it!?

robert fans mad at paps- Yeah we are! Mad that we don’t get to be up in Rob’s face experiencing for ourselves what a “nice guy” he is. If we were to throw a camera in Rob’s face & use a fast shutter 100 times over, we’d be considered stalkers. And how is it stalking if I’m just using those pictures for my OWN personal collection? To add to my 2010 “Rob Pattinson Sex on Legs” 5″ 3 ring binder? Explain THAT.

rob’s crotch- Sigh… my grandmother would be so proud

sad faces with letters First there was Sad GQ Rob then there was Sad Panda Rob- we don’t discriminate. We write letters to all forms of sad faces:

robert pattinson croatia- Sorry- probably never gonna happen but I hear Beirut has a chance this year.

pattinson muscle car- HA! Little did you know that your man, after he caught you up late Robsessing &  LTRing one too many nights, would believe you when you told him you were actually doing “research” for his birthday present by looking at pictures of an old “muscle car” Rob Pattinson was seen driving around. Better hope you’re not recognizable in your gravatar because 4 of your men found LTR by searching for more info on their “birthday presents.” You don’t want them finding out “birthday present” really means “Horny talk about sparklepeen with women I met online”

interpretation of too far gone by sam badley- Good try Sam. We know you’re still Googling stuff about yourself- hoping to find legit sites interpreting your songs. Sorry- it’s just us. Just us here STILL after all these months interpreting “Too Far Gone” as a completely different song from “Never think”

what is robert pattinson’s cell phone number- Well, Jitterbugs don’t have numbers- you just dial 0 for the operator and ask to speak to your grandson in Toledo. But his iPhone # is 1-800-FUC-KOFF

robsten are officially on- It’s about DAMN TIME you found out! You finally figured out all those secret messages we wrote in between paragraphs in the margins of our posts didn’t you? They were code from Kristen & Rob themselves passed thru us to you. Highlight the page- you’ll see what I mean.

Robsten are on
gold brocade bedding-
Not here. Maybe try Bed Bath & Beyond.com but we’re glad you found us. Do you like all the pictures of Rob’s crotch?
Hey this is Rob- I love Kristen

michael crea bookends– I had no idea what this meant. I was so confused that I googled it myself & what do you know? LTR pops up. Apparently one time Moon wrote about a “michael Crea bookend” Of course she meant to write Michael Cera just as you meant to google, but we’re glad you found us. We’re like Michael Cera except completely different, although one time some writer called Kristen Stewart to the female Michael Cera & we haven’t stopped laughing since.
Hey this is Kristen. I love Rob. But shh sometimes I miss Oregano. He had better pot

edward cohen dance me to the end of love– Dear lord THAT is the worst mistake ever made on google. Take it back. It’s Leonard Cohen. OR Edward Cullen. Two different people. One amazing song (this is my fav version in case you’ve ignored my attempts to have you listen to it before)

do all people jizz in pants- Nope Only Edward Cullen in Biology class. And you apparently since you googled it. You might want to get that checked out….

dirty ridingboots- I have no idea how you ended up here and I hope you figured out a way to clean off those riding boots & that it has nothing to do with jizzing in your pants … or your boots..

draco malfoy porn picture- Finally- a google term that makes sense as this is something we clearly post about quite often. I mean who DOESN’T want to see Draco Malfoy completely nude?

in n out burger swim trunks- nope not here. but when you find them can you pass on the link? I know a guy who would DEF buy those…

how to get over my obsession for robert pattinson
help im a mother and obssessed with robert pattinson
help, i’m 45 and obsessed with robert pattinson
– Wow.Clearly you’ve come to the right place. Also.. you need help. But Come back after you get it. That’s Kinda not really Normal

sockless zac efron– There’s nothing we like more either than a kid on the verge of gaydom without his socks on. We understand.

True love is in black AND White

show proof that rob loves kristen july 3rd 2010– You want proof? Here’s the proof: Have you found any bear skin rugs in stores lately? Nope. Me neither. That’s your proof- Rob & Kristen bought them all. They plan on being together for a long effing time.

porn+bearskin- And now even MORE proof. Even the people searching for porn know that this is the place to go to get the proof that bear skin rugs are proven magicness-match-makers for long lasting, fireplace co-star love making

rob pattinson and kristen stewart porn– You’ve definitely come to the wrong place. Unless you’re looking for Robsten Fan Fiction- We have Plenty of that. It’s a somewhat past time of ours. Side note: there were 5 searches for “Nikki Reed Porn” but this was the only search that mentioned Kristen. SAD FOR KRISTEN. Also SAD for Nikki REED! Also
SAD for us for having a site where “porn” is googled & we are found!!!!

What have YOU been googling lately!?

NO seriously…. I love this game- It’s fun to see how other people found LTR. So whether it was FOREVER ago or just recently, how DID you find us!? Oh and after the jump, enjoy a surprise: Continue…

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