Letter to Rob about the Photo where he looks like he climbed out of a grave
Dear Rob,
First time, long time (lolz), so I’ve been a fan since before the movies came out (a hipster twilight fan if you may) and it used to be that every morning I would sign into my computer at work and then SCOUR the interwebs for any news on Twilight and you. I would then compile said info and forward it to 4 or 5 other obsessed friends because obviously I have no life. [UC Note: nope. That’s Normal. I miss those days]
As the years passed, I lost a bit of interest. More websites started to pop up and it began to get really difficult hitting EVERY site at work to get my Rob fix (mo money mo problems yo) , so I just had to quit this addiction. I knew the info would find me if it was big enough. The movies came out, my hope for Midnight Sun faded into almost non-existence and Robsten became sort of a reality.
Today, I was reading some of my celebrity blogs and it said something like “Kristen’s really blowing the BD2 premier planning” and I Google image searched “Rob and Kristen” to see if I could catch an updated glimpse of either of you. Have you googled yourself lately?!? There are LOTs of photos of you, but the ONE I had buried deep in my memory, the one that stopped me in my mouse tracks, was this f*cking trainwreck of a photo:
And I cackled. Oh did I cackle, LOUD. I had COMPLETELY forgotten about this shoot! With THE HAND. Holy shit I was horrified, as were the rest of the fandom. There were comments thrown about that you looked like you crawled out of a grave. I also remember how I couldn’t stop staring at your chest all pale and sorta Burt Reynolds-y. It was the first time we were given what could have been such a great gift. (As I am writing this and sneaking peeks at this photo, I just can’t stop laughing.) But it was done so so so wrong. Ugh, the hair (wow that hair, Donald Trump is envious, it’s feathered and stupid, with BANGS), and the lipstick, and the dirty shirt, and THE HAND.
Looking back through all these photos though, it shows how far Twilight has come. Looking at all the various other photos just on the first page alone, (if you can get past some really bad man-nips that make you look like your neck is broken) you can see such a change in all of your faces. You were just kids when you started this and now years later, you are finishing the saga and probably happy to close this chapter in your life and NOW you have a real life break up to go through. (I couldn’t listen to Mazzy Star for YEARS without thinking of an ex boyfriend, I can’t imagine PLAYING a character that people LOVE (areobsessedwith) and EVER being able to WANT to relive any of it now there such a bad breakup involved). However, time passes and eventually you start thinking about Fade Into You and how you really liked it, and well my point is, this too shall pass. My advice: Put all your mementos in a cigar box and hide it under your bed or closet for a few years. When you are ready, pull it out and go through it, while you are at it, check out the Google images of yourself and watch the box set of the Twilight Saga too.
Sincerely,
Rob&Katy2013
THAT PHOTO IS THE WORST AND I CAN’T BELIEVE IT’S ALMOST BEEN 4 YEARS AND WE NEVER DISCUSSED IT ON LTR!