Robert Pattinson is auctioned off to the highest bidder

Heh... heh... you bid HOW much???

Dear Rob,

Remember a few weeks ago when I wrote to explain that a meeting with you was being auctioned off and that it was oddly worded to include a 2 night stay in a hotel and that at press time the bids were around $10,000. WEEELLLL the auction ended and you’re never guess how much the package went for. No, seriously you’ll never guess!!! Ok, ready? A POSSIBLE (yea, the description saidthey couldn’t even guarantee you’d be there!) meet-n-greet with you on the set of Breaking Dawn in Vancouver went for a bid of EIGHTY THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!!!!!!!! That’s an 8 with 4 zeros behind it!! For that kind of money I would expect to live with you in LA RENT FREE for like the next 5 years where you feed me Flaming Hot Cheetos while I watch episodes of The Office in my Hello Kitty pj’s. Not a MAYBE chance of seeing you in a city where it SNOWS.

In light of this news we came up with some mini letters we want to share…

Dear 15 year old who won,
Your Daddy regrets missing your Quinceanera, huh? Is this his way of making it up to you? Did you threaten to runaway if he didn’t buy this for your episode of My Super Sweet 16 (or 15 in this case)?

You lucky bizzzznatch. Too bad you will not have the life experience to know what to do with this man. Once again youth (and My Super Sweet 16) is wasted on the young.

Jealous,
Moon and UC

OOOORRRRR….

Ok... maybe it's worth it

Dear Grown-ass woman who bid 80,000 bucks and won,
You do realize that you’re now on “The List” right? The maker’s of “The List” don’t care that it’s going to a charity that no one’s ever heard of. Nice try on trying get 2 days with Rob in a hotel room but clearly, you’re not an LTR regular to know we’re about as serious as a fanny pack. But you…you’re full fledge on “The List.”

Scared for you,
Moon and UC

Rob- tell your people they better step up their game and make sure you don’t just decide to take off one day to make a quick run to Norman’s Rare Guitar’s in the Valley, while some poor rich girl sits in a Vancouver hotel room sobbing about draining her 401 and her inheritance on a POSSIBLE chance to meet you. Show her a good time, buy her a pitcher of PBR at a dive bar, show her a couple dumpsters and wash your hair. You know a real Robert Pattinson experience. I mean it’s EIGHTY THOOOOUUUUUSAND smackers!

Wishing we had a 80 thousand bones (to NOT spend on Rob),
Moon and UC

Srsly, 80K?! WTF? Anyone? Is this just us or do you guys think this is insane?

Our internet game is ridiculous: LTT, The Forum, Twitter, The Store

Source

105 Commented

Rob’s on the auction block and I make a plan

Read this:

Dear Rob,

Do you know that a 2 night stay in a hotel with you during Breaking Dawn Filming in Vancouver, is being auctioned off for a good cause?

You must have been listening when I wanted you to be more like Kellan in regards to charity. But this is AHMAZING! I mean talk about sacrifice! You never know WHO could win this thing or who you’ll be in a hotel room with for 2 nights. It could be a crazy Krisbian who really just wants to meet Kristen or wants to tell you to treat her right, or maybe it’s it Taylor Swift hoping to win back TLaut or it could be one of those crazy Rob fans who are “on the list.” You know the list. OR it could be me because I’ve taken out a 2nd mortgage, drained my 401K, withdrew all our LTT store money (27 dollars!) and “borrowed” all of UC and Mr. Choice’s life savings (shhh! Don’t tell) and started selling life size cardboard Jumping Rob’s (a gabillion in preorders already!). So I’m pretty sure, unless Nikki Reed starts bidding against me (I can’t compete against revenge money) I will win!! Don’t be scuuuurrred!

But what will we do for 2 whole days in a hotel room? Ok, get your mind out of the gutter (no wait, don’t).

I’ve come up with a few ideas for our two days…

and just because we can now… follow the jump(ing Rob) for the rest!!
Continue…

145 Commented

Rob's only outfit

Dear Rob,

Looks like you and Kristen were caught having a fun night out on the town this weekend in Vancouver by this girl.  All of us girls in “The Quad” have lives and never talk on the weekends (we usually just don’t do our jobs and talk throughout the workday), so we couldn’t do our normal “Breaking it down Vanity-Fair Style.” But that didn’t stop us from discussing the situation through e-mail:

Damn! Caught

Friend #1: Seriously?  She LEANED next to a freakin’ CAB for a picture?  This will need some breaking down…in the future…’cause they are together.  Ahem.  I don’t wanna hear this “buddies” shizz, either.
Friend #2: They are sooooo together. Look at them…chillaxin together. Being comfortable together. She obviously is “in” to him because she will hang out with him when he is wearing his only outfit.
Friend #1: Friend #2, will you marry me? THIS:  “she will hang out with him when he is wearing his only outfit…”  OUTSTANDING.  You are brilliant. P.S. And the look on KStew’s face in that pic?  It’s not ’cause she’s aggrivated with the fan encounter…it’s cause she’s totally thinking, “Damn, we’re SO busted.”
Friend #2: EXACTLY what I was thinking. She KNEW
Moon: I think shes thinking “damn i had a lot to drink and good god this bitch’s flash is bright. and she needs to hurry up and close the effing door.. it’s flipping cold outside.” yea she thought ALL that. PS Yes that is his ONE outfit. Lord help us.
UC: But yes, Rob & K thought they were being sneaky.. Rob is shakin’ his head saying “damn, this girl is gonna ruin our fun.”

You know us- we will, until the day we die, go down saying we know you and Kristen had/have/will continue to have a “thing.” Nikki is back in LA, Michael flew home so you’re free to hook-up, eat Indian food & take drunk pics in cabs.  We hate it, we’re jealous. The only time we like to admit that you and Kristen hooked up is when you were shooting these two scenes:

and

and who are we kidding? We’d all hang out with you when you’re wearing your one and only outfit (or when you’re not wearing it. Cuz when you’re not in your only outfit, well.. you’re not in any outfit and all and that’s not disgusting)

Love,
UnintendedChoice for “The Quad”

Thanks to Robsessed, as always, for the cab pic AND the .gifs and then there’s this story that we all know is a bunch of lies from the girl in the pic on imdb about how “they’re just friends.”

846 Commented

Just another note for Sam Bradley

Skinny jeans and shitty shoes, that's def. Rob hiding in the back

Dear Rob,

Peek-a-boo. I see you behind the curtains at Sam Bradley’s show. Can you pass along this message to your buddy for me? Thanks xo.

Sam-

I’m giving you mad props for riding your new-found fame the right way.  85% of the girls at your shows are there because you’re Rob’s bud, and they hope to see Rob. I think you know that, but you’re not bitter.

You’re not sitting around feeling sorry for yourself that your boy is the big hot star and you are riding in his shadow. No- you’re taking ADVANTAGE of your friend’s fame and using it to help YOUR career. And I respect that. I shouldn’t- I should tell you it’s selling out and it’s using Rob and it’s lame because you and Rob have no real connection other than your friendship and a song you wrote together (that is actually two separate songs but you got confused and/or drunk) that made it on a hit soundtrack. But I’m not going to tell you that because I think you’re a legit guy, and I hope that someday you and I become bff’s. And I don’t just hope that because I want to meet Rob at your next birthday party (well, 15% of me doesn’t hope for that reason).

I say keep running with what you got. Play tons of shows, hint that Rob might show up, and sell LOTS of CDs and merch to the suckas who come just to hear Rob. But as a gal with a music business degree who was a kickin’ artist management intern in ’04, I have to offer this advice: find yourself an audience other than Rob Pattinson fans.  Because the minute you and Robbie fight over something lame like who put a hole in Rob’s shiteous blue sweater from his HP days, or who was the first to kiss Shelly Smith during spin the bottle in 9th grade or you rag on Rob for actually getting down and dirty with KStew last year and your friendship ends, there goes 85% of your fanbase.

Looking forward to seeing you when you play Philly (I promise only 72% of me will be hoping Rob decides to show),

UnintendedChoice

(Um, did I just write a post that was mostly nice and barely snarky?  I feel weird. I’m sorry… let me fix that: Uh, your music isn’t that great. That’s not really true. I kinda like it. Damn, I got nothing. Enjoy this moment.. it rarely happens.)

Pic Proof Source

First letter we wrote to Sam (and Sam left us a comment- Sorry I was kinda mean in response… uh.. i’ll be nicer this time, promise)

We usually keep Rob letters on just LTR, but today LTT has some Rob-related shizz

Dazzle Awards. Help us win. Now

162 Commented