You know that shirt you wear when you wanna be flippant and cool and think you’re all hardcore? The BEASTIE BOYS Tour shirt from whatever over priced online vintage store you bought it from which according to people with too much time on their hands is worth about 250 bucks. Yea, like I said too much time on their hands. BUUUUTTT that is neither here nor there. When you bought it they told you it was super limited edition and no one else would have it… WELLLLLLL lookie what I found…
(Google “Rob Pattinson ‘Get off my dick'” and you’ll find the picture!)
DUDE… you know how they say pets resembles owners or couples start to look like each other after they’re together a long time? Yea, whatever it is she’s becoming YOU. Dude, maybe she wants to BE you. All along it’s hasn’t been about love or lust or like it’s been about her taking your place! I mean look at the signs bro… TomStu is now in a movie with her, they’ve been seen at parties together, she’s probably played the guitar with him, she’s hung out with your family and now she’s trying to tell you to stay off her Dick! She wants your dad all to herself. Who wouldn’t want to be the recipient of those emails?
So this is a little warning letter just so you’re watching your step. This has the hints of a Stage 5 Clinger, if this ends bad, she will either burn your house to the ground like Angela Bassett in Waiting to Exhale or will skin you and wear you like last years Versace (holler Real Housewives of Jersey!). I’m just saying watch out… and like Eric Yorkie says, ” I got your back baby.”
It’s alright, stay on my dick,
So what’s the deal with this shirt? Classy, trashy? A “statement” to anyone? Or kids who think they’re so cool?
Learn more about KStew’s outfit than you ever cared to know at Kristen Stewart Fashion courtesy of a fan
Tags: , Angela Bassett, Beasties Boys, dad, Dick Pattinson, Eric Yorkie, funny, Kristen Stewart, Real Housewives of New Jersey, robert pattinson, Robsten, vintage, Waiting to Exhale