Breaking Down Rob’s big night out in Weho

Dear Rob,

It has come to our attention that you were recently spotted out to dinner in West Hollywood California & pictures were taken

Upon being viewed by ourselves, the following conversation occurred:

The one where we know where you should go instead

UC: Okay so let’s have a serious convo: I’ve been to LA- I’ve seen the sites. I know that Weho (west hollywood) is the LAST PLACE someone who doesn’t want to be papped would go. So that leaves us with two options
1) Rob & Kristen WANT to be papped..
Moon: Uh oh, you said “Rob & Kristen” and weren’t intentionally trying to make fun. Prepare to get the beat down, UC
UC: Meh. Bring it.  2) They don’t book their own restaurant reservations
Moon: I think it’s both of those.
UC: But Rob & Kristen HATE been seen in public. They would NEVER EVER EVER go willingly to a public place in the one place in the world where there are more paparazzi than ANYWHERE else
Moon: And They don’t make their own reservations cause they’re STARS
UC: Right. And also Rob can’t work anything but the Jitterbug phone. So WHO makes STARS restaurant reservations?
Moon: Plus their people want them seen. So wham bam thank you pam (their assistant)
UC: Do their assistants call? Which, as far as we know….. they don’t have..
Moon: Pam!!
UC: Besides Pam! They DO have managers- specifically ROB does…. and one who is pretty slimy and squirely. SO.. did Nick tell Rob & K he got them ressies at a Red Lobster in the Valley where “no one will know who you are?” But instead he sends them to Weho. And not just ANYWHERE in Weho- to eat ITALIAN
Moon: Big Daddy is pissed off somewhere
UC: It’s real life Bella & Edward out eating ITALIAN!! And Stephenie is excited & praying that at least one of them ordered mushroom ravioli. Steph Meyer- not Ritz. It’s her fantasy come true.
Moon: Right, Ritz is more of a lasagna-type of girl. Do you think the waitress was like OMG!!! It’s like Bella and Edward really at Bella Italia, and they’re really ordering mushroom ravioli! And then she was like “well I should go try to put the moves on Rob- this being life imitating art and all”
UC: Yes. I think that’s exactly what happened. Except it was a gay guy waiting on them. It is Weho & all
But seriously- what do we have to do to get these two to listen to US? ROB & KRISTEN: WE WILL MAKE YOUR DINNER RESSIES And they will be NOWHERE near Beverly Hills, Weho or anything with “wood” in its name.
Moon: We will send you somewhere were no one has a camera- a commune in Utah.

MUCH more after the jump! Continue…

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