Where in the world is the Edward Cullen doll? Oh, just hanging out with some cute bunnies

Dear Rob,

My guess is that when you signed that part of your Twilight contract that said “will allow likeness to be made into small plastic doll with ‘ming reading‘ abilities” you didn’t actually believe your likeness would be made into a small plastic doll causing 2 blogger-friends to buy said small plastic doll, set-up photoshoots for this doll and post pictures that they and their blogger friends take for the world’s viewing pleasure. Hey, I never thought in a million years I’d walk into Hot Topic and now I have a filled frequent buyer card, so I get it.

"Hey, 'sup?"

"What? You think I'm gonna bite?"

"Don't you dare touch my peacoat"

Love,
UnintendedChoice 

Pictures & bunnies courtesy of Julie (yep- the same Julie with the best husband ever). PS: I want to kiss your bunnies and feed them carrots. 

Twi-alentine’s Day Contest. Do it. 

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The Dirt (pictures edition)

Dear Rob,

I like when there are new pics of you for me to drool look at very respectfully. (although, since you have longer hair in these pics, I know they’re technically not new)

Are you smiling b/c you know you'll meet me someday?

Where are your mommy and daddy vampires?

Hey themoonisdown, wanna do me a favor and get rid of that annoying "A" in photoshop? xo

Sigh, just ignore Kristen, I do.

Thanks to the girls at Robert Pattinson life for the pics.

Love, me (xo)

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The (Defamer) dirt

Dear Rob,

Defamer has been loving you (and other Twi-stuff) this week:

• First you were spotted in Los Feliz.
• Then you were spotted at the same time in London (yeah yeah, I told you this yesterday)
• Then you said something that I kinda have to talk to you about. (see below xo)
• Then they talked about Taylor buffing up.

  See? They’re blowing you (and Taylor) up!

Okay, let’s talk about what you apparently said to that girl in your days before Twilight.

“If I could, I’d have a ____ on the inside of my elbow so I could lick it all day long.”

Um, sweetie? What did you actually say to the girl? Because some things come to mind…. and those things aren’t the sweet things that come out of the mouth of the beautiful man (you!) who sings Never Think.

I’m a generally positive thinker, so this is what I’m guessing you actually want to lick:

• a picture of UnintendedChoice & theMoonisDown
• a little tiny kitty cat
• a big slice of pepperoni pizza
• Jonathan Taylor Thomas (stolen from the comments in the defamer post and too good not to repost here!)

Oh, to be a bird in your cage

If you did happen to say what it sounds like you might have said, I’m willing to forgive you.  My guess is you got drunk with Sam Bradley and he dared you to say it (any insight on this Sam?). Or I know things weren’t going so well for you a year ago- failing career, couldn’t get a date, etc. etc., so maybe you just had a slip-up and thought that’s what girls wanted to hear.

I think you know this now, but just to clarify: most girls don’t want to hear that. (I know, I know.. reading the comments on our site, you’d probably beg to differ that there are a few girls out there that would take ANYTHING you’d say)

Just an FYI for the future, stick to brooding, dazzling & singing next time you’re trying to pick up a girl! Or, here’s a thought, don’t try to pick up any girls. Just wait patiently for me to figure out how to juggle a husband AND you at the same time (without breaking any of those vows I said on 6/2/06)

Love,
me (UnintendedChoice)

What do you guys think Rob actually said?

19 Commented

Where in the world is the Edward action figure?

You thought you could hide!

Dear Rob-

So looks like your Edward action figure came out even sooner than we thought. Cause I found it today at Borders by accident. BTW, this action figure is quite lame. It’s too bad you probably don’t have final sign off on ANY of the crap your face is on.

My dear Robby this is going to be the beginning of something beautiful 😀

XO-
Me (themoonisdown)

So of course this leads me to post our latest “Where is the world…” installment:

Borders, Hollywood!

PS Everyone read all about the Eddy doll at LTT

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Coming to a Forks Dream House near you!

action heroes wearing peacoats! my how things have changed!

Dear Rob-

I guess these new action figures they’re planning on selling at Hot Topic are better than those other creepy Twilight dolls but what’s really on my mind is… are these action figures anatomically correct?

<3
Me

PS hey gals, guess you can stop worrying about crushing that paperdoll cut out of robby you’ve been carrying around in your bag and I can start a new feature along with the pillow (post coming soon), where in the world is the Edward action figure?! 😀

PISTNB

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