Rob MIA from Eclipse International Press. Why? He’s got a GREAT reason!

Don't worry about me guys, too busy stuck in this doorway to head to other countries

Dear Rob,

So either you got hella lucky by scheduling a film during Eclipse press time or you have Summit by the balls because you haven’t had to leave my fair city of Los Angeles to travel the world and schlock Eclipse like Taylor and Kristen have. And they can’t give the New Moon excuse of you being more of a peripheral character so you’re not as integral to the press for the movie cause Edward is all up in this one, like a Twihard at a 100 Monkeys show or an LOD-er at a Britpack show, or Ascot Phil in Bobby Long’s biizzzznnnaaaassss. You get the picture.

So I’m gonna go with the latter. You tell Summit how high you want to jump and they say ‘that’s perfect Rob! We’ll send over a fruit basket and keg to your undisclosed location in the woods/hotel/car park of In-N-Out.” Well, work it dude cause the more you stay here in LA the more that gives me opportunities to “run into you” and also it saves me a TON of time because now I don’t have to watch interviewers from Germany awkwardly ask you about your alleged relationship with Kristen and you don’t have to spin it into a story about body odor or male pregnancy. THANK YOU! I truly owe you a lot for this.

I now have a lot more time to pour over the hours of Stephenie Meyer interview tapes or try to figure out how to hack into your parents GPS system so it routes them right to my front door. They’ll have a lot of fun, trust me. I have a bbq grill and enough scrapbooking crap to last 10 lifetimes, what more could a Mom and Dad want?

Who knows what you’re up to cause if you’re not with me or in my presence I don’t want to think about it, cause having you within the same city limits as me and not knowing where you’re at is maddening. Really, what could you be doing? You haven’t been seen anywhere, shooting anything, doing anyone… that is until today when this picture surfaced from a new photoshoot…


If THIS is what you’ve been up to instead of heading off to foreign lands than NEVER LEAVE AGAIN! PLAY ON SIR… PLAY ON!!!!!!

If you haven’t already made this your new computer desktop wallpaper than now is the time… don’t worry, I’ll wait.

Off to find this dried up patch of land with a brooding Rob in it! Peace out bitches!
Themoonisdown

So what’s Rob been up to since we last saw him at Leno? Besides stalking UC and me at the SMeyer interview… How quick did this become your new wallpaper? Why do you think he’s not traipsing the world promoting Eclipse?

New hottness photo from Robert Pattinson Life

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95 Commented


MTV Movie Awards – My blinking heart crotch beats only for Rob

(Welcome to our new digs!! This is LTR, have a look around and update your bookmarks!)

Dear Rob,

The MTV movie awards started off with such promise…

This happened…

You and Taylor kicking ass in a fake movie with a BLONDE handlebar mustache!


MTV could have just stopped the show after this, really how could it have gone up from here? MTV blew their wad in the first 5 seconds… Time to get some TV Viagra MTV, so you can last for the WHOLE 93254902348 hours this show drags on.

Didn’t see it live?

Also kudos to MTV for resurrecting a movie character over 2 years old as the main character for half the bits they played. Len Grossman?? Way to stay current folks! Who ever said you gous lost touch with pop culture? Speaking of, what about that Len Grossman (Tom Cruise) slash Jennifer Lopez performance, huh?! Another banner moment in irrelevancy for the night.

Follow the cut to see Rob win some awards, some other stuff happens and we have a GIVEAWAY!!
Continue…

311 Commented


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